Another one of life's disappointments. Seems like I have been getting a lot of them lately... Basically, for the last 40 years of my measly life.
I'm not quite sure if this was Bar-be-cue... It was more like Elec-tro-cute. I'm sorry, an Electric Smoker just ain't gonna cut it. Especially, with Fox Bros down yonder with real smokers. The flavor just isn't there without the smoke. It's kinda like touching the tip of your tongue on a 9 Volt battery... Thanks, but don't taze me, bro! Drowning the slop in liquid smoke ain't gonna help either.
I really hoped this would be a contender with the few real bbq joints but it barely competes with Shane's. I think I hear Sonny's laughing...
Fried Oyster Po'boy (half) - What in God's name is this thing? A sandwich for ants? 3 pathetic tiny oysters. Shit, they were just shriveled up little raisins. Put a fucking diaper around those baby buns and sacks... I'm not a pedophile but this Po'baby wasn't even worth putting in my mouth.
3 Meat Combo - Brisket, pulled 'prok' and baby back ribs... Brisket seemed like it was poached, zero smoke ring, dry rub and bark, pretty much flavorless. Pulled 'prok' was dry, stringy and mushy in some areas, again no flavor. Baby back ribs were "pre-cut" to give it that "fall off the bone" characteristic... Shit, that thing was off the bone before it even came out of the vacuum pack. Everything seemed like it was poached first. It looked like a wrinkly old woman. I had better BBQ from a George Foreman grill.
BBQ Sauces - Spicy and Sweet. Might as well be from Panda Express... It was so watery, those squeeze bottles can double for squirt guns. And it did, all over my fucking white shirt. I'm not a fat slob, I swear.
Brunswick Stew - It was more like Brunswick Swamp... A cup of watery tomato juice filled with 'prok', raw cubed taters, a sprinkle of corn and beans, no okra or chicken. The only thing Stew about this was the guy's name who scooped it into the cup.
Creamed Corn - My "ears" hurt from hearing about how great this was... But the only thing I wanted to do with this was cover my ears with them. Grilled corn kernels mixed with mayo and dried spices... No cream, no nothing. Shit, I'll even take cream cheese! Ah, what's with the lime? This shit ain't a cocktail. Thank God I haven't seen any of it coming out on the other end yet... Yet.
Mac-n-Cheese - Prolly the best thing I had in my mouth all night... Well, that's another story. Plain old elbow mac and Velveeta. A little crispy on top and creamy inside. Not bad but nothing Sandra Lee, a box of mac n cheez and little semi homemade can't accomplish.
Sweet tea & Lemonade cocktail was not bad but so God damn sweet it twicks you into thinking it's just lemonade, I sucked that shit down in 10 seconds flat. Drip.
Mint Julep tasted like monkey urine, not that I know what ape piss juice tastes like but if it did, this would be it. Squirt.
The most annoying thing of sitting outside is the mass abundance of flies. I'm not talking about measly house flies, these fuckers were the size of Bald Eagles... Using a tennis racket would be an understatement.
Come to think of it, I have a better idea for that electric smoker... Put it on the patio and use it as a bug zapper. Obviously, it's not working out for the BBQ.
The future of DBA's BBQ is TBD...
Poof! ...where da smoke at?
Zap.
1190 N Highland Ave NE
Ste B
Atlanta, GA 30306
(404) 249-5000
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