Monday, December 28, 2015

Tava Indian Bistro

I came by here when they first opened... Walked in, no one was around (not even any staff), walked out. Every time I drive by it, it's pretty empty. I had a feeling they may not be open for much longer so I finally made another attempt to see if anyone was in there. Walked in and it was DEAD again, except for one family hidden away in a booth that gave you the impression that it may suck a big fat dosa... But fuck it, I will eat here if it's the last thing I put in my pouch. Sat down across from the only people in here. That family was fat. Indian people usually aren't that fat. But there's exceptions to fat Asians... Yours truly. The father and grandpa had these ginormous pouches, their bellies were all smooshed up against the table even when they were leaning all the way back in that booth... That is the result of years of training their pouch. I could only be so lucky... But I wouldn't want to take off my sandals and go barefoot on the floor like they did... Instagram of Britany Spears barefoot in a gas station shitter popped up in my tiny lobes. Oh yeah, that dude's crusty old dried up foot got me all horned up for some smelly Indian grub. Give it to me good, Patel... Ram that girthy dosa to where the sun don't shine... In da pouch. Squirt.

House Chips, freebie. Some people were saying these are the Bhajiya chips, but they're not. Bhajiya chips are coated in a thin batter and fried with spices. These were plain, uncoated fried chips. It's pretty much a standard hand sliced tater chip but they were freshly made. Crispy and a little grease just so you know it's made in house. The tamarind and coriander sauce were pretty good... Something to dip your spud in. It's nice that they give something to munch on while you look through the menu.

Tava Ragda Patties. Patties? What patties? Oh, it's in there... A la 80's style Prego commercial. Now, it's time to put the patties in my pouch. This was pretty tasty, two large potato patties underneath that mess of shit on top which was a mix of flavors and textures (peas, onions, spices and sauces). This was a good dish, I would get it again.

Egg Katakat, spiced Indian scrambled eggs. Great idea on paper but this execution was a dud. These were the shittest scrambled eggs no matter in what language and cuisine. They were mealy and grainy. Maybe something in their spices made it curdled up and died. This was pretty forgettable but the omelet doesn't sound too bad... That's what I said about the scrambled eggs... "They can't fuck that up"... Famous last words.

Lamb Bheja, lamb brains in Tava seasoning. I can't believe they have brains and kidney on the menu, this almost makes them legit. I asked them if the brains were fresh, they said they just got it this morning. SOLD. I liked the brains, nice colorful dish but the seasoning was a little weak. With brains you need to seriously season them well with spices, butter, garlic, whatever, as long as it keeps you away from thinking you're just eating brains. If they crisped it up a bit and used more garlic and onions along with their house seasoning, this would have been a lot better. It was a bit too soft on the chew... Like brain sashimi. A decent dish but coulda been so much more. May have to try the kidney next time since they slow cook it.

Tava Bhindi, okra tossed in Tava masala. The whole okra were nice but you had to chew it a bit before you can even swallow it... That's what she said. The masala sauce thinger was pretty good flavor wise but the extended chewing session on the okra became annoying after awhile.  

Keema Sandwich, spiced ground lamb. What is this... The Indian Pac-Man or are they harvesting fake boobs from middle aged women? I don't know but I fucking like it. That is a very large bun... Let's see if it's all bun and no meat inside. Who doesn't like a huge heaping of manmeat inside your buns... I like it inside my face gash, too. Just sayin'.

Pop da hood... And there was a fucking huge heaping of ground lamb in there. The soft bread is even buttered and toasted... This can't be real, it must be a dream. First bite... Fuck me and call me Sanjay. This lamb sando was legit, it was really good. That large round bread served a purpose, to keep all the ground lamb bits inside. The spices and flavor of the lamb was really nice, almost like a curried lamb but in hand held form. It kinda reminded me of a Chinese curry bun. Seriously, if the lamb sando was this good, I gotta try their other ones... You motherfuckers got me on yo sandwiches, now, I have to come back, bitches. The chips were the same as the housemade chips, good but how many chips can you eat after all this grub.

Roti. The entrees all come with like 2 roti, so I got like 6 of them. Time to make Indian burritos. I wanted to try the bullet naan but even the pouch was too bloated to even attempt one because it looked like they are a hefty portion at another table I saw.

Jeera Rice. I know it's just friggin rice and cumin seeds but this was kinda boring... C'mon, dress it up a little, a little coriander leaves for color or a lemon wedge so I squirt on it for crying out loud.

I do not dislike this place. The space is modern, the open-ish kitchen is nice to take a peek at the giant tava pans and the menu reads quite well... Not that many will come, but whities would not freak out here (doesn't smell like a dirty carpet Indian buffet joint) but the execution is hit or miss. Sometimes, you expect a dish to come out the way you imagined it but something else appears... Not that it's a bad thing but it could throw you off a bit when it comes to traditional Indian grub with a modern twist here. Since, I like to see new translations of classic dishes by younger creative cooks, I was totally cool with them doing it up their way... Y'all got me on the lamb sando, though. So, I'll be back to try the rest of the sandos, especially, the Nihari (classic Pakistani curry reinvented into a dericious sando), ah, fuck yeah, ese... That is, if they don't close down first.

1685 Church St #110
Decatur, GA 30033 
404-343-2710
http://www.tavaindianbistro.com/ 

1 comment:

faryal naaz said...

Fully appreciate the value you are providing here.
catering