Dumpling Master

What?! For fuck sake... Not another goddamn franchise in this one horse town. Wait, it's a dumpling chain you say? Well, slap my lard ass and call me Sally or is that Sa-rr-y. But does this town really need another mediocre slutty Chino dump for gwailos? Whether we need it or not, this dumpling franchise has been breeding like fucking rabbits. Opening 7 locations within a year's time... Peachtree City, Alpharetta, Chambodia, Dickhater, Buford, Athens and Snellville... And another 4 in the works. Just by the strategic placement of each location, you already know their business model was to cater towards the roundeye demographics. The Pouch already know this ain't gonna be authentic because there were no misspellings on their website or menu. Their website declares, "Where every visit promises culinary excellence."... Where one of the Chef's pick was the Edamame on the menu. If it was an authentic joint, patrons wouldn't be using a QR code to order factory assembly line grub. The menu is the same at all locations but I highly doubt it would taste the same across all locations like any McDonald's worldwide. Keeping it simple is great for consistency but there's no way in hell each location's kitchen staff will have mastered the same cooking techniques and execution... Unless you press a button and wait for the ding. I waited a long time to make my initial visit because the Pouch's instinct has never failed this obeast underlord. 

Fuck me, let's go finally take a first look and taste at the cursed location in Decatur which recently was home to a Pho 24... Will they truly be the Master of Dumpling or will the Marsupial Pouch take a Master Dump...

Definitely the work of a corporate designer for the social media and wannabe influencer crowd. They do have some of the greatest hits for their dim sum. The Decatur location soft opened back in July and was giving out free milk teas... Let's just say I would not get another if they were in perpetual soft opening. It was bad enough for me not to take a pic.

Appz, dumpz, noodz, flied lice and stir flies... The two items that caught my eyeball instantly was the chowfun and mapo tofu... You know that shit will be on the Pouch's docket.

Har Gaw Shrimp Dumpling (6), $7.95. Don't be fooled be the illusion, these were tiny like a baby squirrel just got castrated. The dough was a bit thick and the shrimp was flavorless. I drown them in soy and vinegar and it barely made a difference. Maybe I'm just spoiled by Best BBQ's ginormous flavorful har gaos and compare them to everyone else's version. Skip.

Pork Wonton with Chili Sauce (8), $8.95. What genius picked out this plate for this dish? The vibrant red chili sauce was barely noticeable on the dark plate. I picked up a wonton and wonder why it felt so hard between my chop sticks... I took a nibble and it was cold as ice. They literally took this out of the fridge like a premade carpaccio and spoon chili sauce over it. Bro, at least shock it in boiling water for 5 seconds to trick me. I told the older dude (maybe a manager?), he took it back and came back out with the same exact dish a minute later... WTF! Old Boy literally nuked it and pretended like I wouldn't notice. The dried out hard skin wasn't a dead give away at all. Fuck this shit, yo! 

Soup Dumplings, Pork (6), $8.95. Oh fuck me, now... I can already tell how they will taste by just one glance. The pleats were acceptable but look at how thick these mofos were... I think they used these as prophylactics in the 1600's. With skin that thick, one would think it would hold the soup inside like a Stanley Tumbler. Nope... Wrong again. It barely had any soup inside. Took a nibble on the chewy top and looked inside, not even a puff of steam to convince me it was steamed recently. The only "soup" was just moisture that cooled down and pooled around the marble sized pork filling at the bottom. If you have any leftovers, use them after a bountiful night at Johnny's Hideaway, these Jimmy hats will guarantee to keep out any STD variant even Herpes Simplex 10. What a disappointment but not unexpected.

Pan Fried Dumplings, Seafood & Pork (8), $8.75. What a snoozer... For the price of admission, you can get two big bags of premium frozen gyozas at any Asian markets and make them at home and it would taste 10 times better. Their dumpling sauce was quite lovely, though... The dumps not so much. I looked around and the gringos were devouring these like wolves chewing off their own leg in a jaw trap. Hey, more power to them, tripods.

Shen Jian Bao, Pork (5), $9.95. So, if my fuzzy math is correct, each bao cost $2.19 a piece... Nevermind. These Shanghai style baos are on the smaller size than a normal pan fried baozi. They are known for their crispy bottom, soft doughy top and juicy savory pork filling but it was barely browned. They are passable but at $2 a piece, not really worth it.

Shen Jian Bao, Beef (5), $9.95. The only difference is the color, they are slightly pink which may put off some roundeyes. These were browned a bit better with a hint of crispiness but the beef filling was dense and not juicy at all. Skip these.

Pork Wonton Noodle Soup, $9.95. The noodles used were the wrong ones but the broth was actually quite decent and the wontons were acceptable even though they used the cheaper wrapper, wrapper made with egg is preferred. This was a pretty big bowl of noodle soup and it was quite satisfying but if they had the correct thin wonton noodles this woulda been a winner.

Green Beans with Garlic, $11.95. These were pretty good but it needed a lot more crispy garlic and they didn't use ground pork bits. The pork makes a huge difference in this dish but the color was vibrant and it had a nice toothy snap with each bite. The portion size should have been a bit more generous at this price point.

Beef Chow Fun, $15.95. I literally asked the Chinese server if the chow fun was the real deal and he nodded yes... Then this came out. Wha da fuk is this slop? It looks like a beef chowfun but it ingredients are all wrong. The thin ass noodles should never be used in this dish. It needs to be the wide rice noodles so it can absorb all the flavors. The dull color is evidence that they didn't use dark soy or not enough. Red onion is fine but yellow onion is preferred for the sweetness. The bok choy is ok but not necessary. But the bean sprouts is a must and needed more of it, a lot more. The beef was not sliced across the grain and it was chewy as fuck. It wasn't seasoned at all. This is one of the worst chow fun I have ever had and for $16 this was an absolute horror show. But I shouldn't expect a properly executed Cantonese dish at a Shanghai style joint. Avoid this at all costs.

Mapo Tofu, $12.95. WOW... Can this be true? Did they redeemed themselves after that shit show of a chow fun? This mapo tofu dish sure did. Look at the vibrant red color... Let's take a closer look...

Wow, this looked legit... And for the taste test. The flavor was good and it actually have some heat and spiciness to the sauce. Only thing missing was the pork bits. Just like the green beans, it needs the fatty savory bits of pork to round off the dish. But it was still a good dish and for $13, it was worth the price of admission. 

This is not authentic by any means but you don't expect it to be at a franchise joint. No one fucking expects gourmet Chino at PF Chang's or Panda Express but you would think the dumplings would be good at a place called Dumpling Master. Sadly, the dumps were probably the worst part of the menu. The green beans and mapo tofu were good but it's not enough to get me back here. But for everyone else, this will do.  

Time for the Pouch to take a master dump... Splash.

Flush.

1248 Clairmont Rd

Suite 1A

Decatur, GA 30030

https://dumplingmaster.us/

Nanbei Gourmet

Over the last year, the Pouch has been on a homestyle Asian comfort grub and street food kick. Every new and existing gringo resto has been such a snoozefest with nothing exciting, just the same old generic items on every menu... It's like they're still stuck in the COVID era and trying to compete for the same demographics with a limited menu but who can charge more for the same slop and what dummy will pay for it. There's no honor in paying more for the same dish pretending to support local businesses... I'm all for supporting local but no one cares about bragging rights anymore except Yelpers. I have mostly passed on American restos because I was tired of being insulted dish after dish as if I was reading the children's menu. Shit, I have ordered from the children's menu on a few occasions because the main menu was full of crap. This fat overlord wants excitement, diversity, quality and value these days.  

The Chinatown food court exemplifies these traits and has been so consistent over the years that it's been on my regular rotation for over 2 decades. I have my go-to's but I have always noticed why there was an unfilled stall in the back corner for such a length of time. Then suddenly a new place popped up and I took a gander at their menu. It was a mixed of Chino cuisines, Sichuan, Cantonese, Lanzhou, Taiwan and Slutty-Chino. But what really got me excited was the prices... They were substantially less than all the other stalls... How and why but long story short, this joint has been on my regular rotation for the last few months and if I can't find anything else new and interesting to eat, this will be my back up plan. I have been waiting to review this newcomer because I didn't want any Yelpers to flash mob this joint and ruin it like they ruin everything else that they touch. Since, the cat is out of the bag... Let's take a look at all the dishes I have tried so far and some over and over again... 

 

This is their new menu, cut down by half from the original menu which was pretty extensive. Since, they have been getting more popular and sometimes even a line to order, they have raised their prices from 10-30% which is pretty high but still worth the price of admission. 

First snack visit, test run on a few items.

Shanghai Juicy Steamed Pork Bun (8), $8. They were so juicy that they shat all over themselves, all the soup leaked out. The skin was too thick and the pork mixture was too chunky and unseasoned. This was such a bad start that I pretty much gave up on them on the first dish... Until the next dish.

Dry-Fried French Beans with Minced Pork and Preserved Vegetables, $9 (now $10). This dry fried green beans was so good and the portion was generous. This won me back instantly. It's pretty hard not to order this on every visit.

Beef Chowfun, $9 (now $10). There is no place in da ATL that you can get a quality beef chowfun for $10. The $1 increase is nothing for the huge portion size. The flavor and seasoning and correct ingredients make this one of my favorites. I have ordered this pretty much on every visit.

Second visit, I wanted to try a mix of dishes which turned out very satisfying.

Beef Tendon & Tripe in Chili Sauce, $9 (now $11). I can't say this enough, their portions are very generous to the price ratio. Look at this beast, it was awesome and spicy enough even for my volcano mouth. The balance of both cuts was perfect and the seasoning was spot on. You get a bit of both in each bite.

Beef Noodle Soup, $9 (now $11). They used to have a lamb noodle soup on the menu but was never available on my visits. So, I settled for the beef noodz. This was a giant bowl of soup and tons of big chunks of meat. Fresh egg noodles are usually used in this dish, but I was curious of what type of noodles were under there, so I mixed it up a bit... 

Holy shit, they were using the knife sliced wide noodles... Albeit not fresh made but still I was so psyched for this. Wide sliced noodles just grabs onto the soup better than thinner noodles. I loved the texture of everything in this bowl... The big chunks of meat paired perfectly with the wide noodles. The soup was rich and complex and full of flavor that will satisfy the pouch during a cold wet day. For $11, it's still worth it.

Fish & Eggplant with Plum Sauce, $12 (now $13). This was an interesting combo, lightly fried fish fillets stir fried with garlicky Japanese eggplant with a light sweet "Plum" sauce. This was very tasty. I loved the crisp crunch of the flaky fish and then the soft savory eggplant with a hint of sweetness. I wished they made this portion as large as all the other dishes, still a very respectable portion.

Wait, did I forget to order the beef chowfun? Oh, that's right, I switched it for the beef noodle soup... Which was a nice trade off.

Third visit, I had to get a traditional spicy dish and the beef chowfun again.

Mapo Tofu, $9 ($10). Wow, look at that vibrant deep red color! This already looked legit. The tofu cube size, the pebbles of pork were spot on. What about the spicy level, Pouch... Did it pass the obeast test? Fuck yeah, it did. When you poured it over rice, the rice instantly absorbed the red chili oil and gave you the full experience with each bite. This was a perfectly executed mapo tofu. 

Dry Fried Green Beans, $10. They shortened the name on the new menu, good... And it still tasty great. Totally worth it for the large portion.

Dry-Fried Beef Rice Noodles, $10. I can't be away from this amazing dish for too long. $10 is still the cheapest around in this town. Even HK BBQ next door is charging like $13+ for this dish. They were tasty but for a few dollars less, I can this incredible beef noodz only a few feet away.

Tientsin Steamed Pork Bun (6), $6. They are pretty fat and the price stayed the same... All their dumps are like $1 each. These were fine, nothing to write home about. The dough is pretty thick and gummy and the meatball inside was smaller than it appears. The flavor was acceptable but I would skip all their dumpling dishes and put the loot into other dishes yet to be tasted.

On the most recent visit, I was surprised by the new smaller menu format and price increases. They kept their most popular and regularly ordered dishes. They removed a lot of scary sounding dishes and a bunch of slutty-Chino Americanized dishes. Which was a good move. Kept the menu doable and quickly executable. There was one classic Sichuan dish that I wanted to wait to try and today was the day.

Sliced Fish in Hot Chili Oil, $13 (previous $12). Look at that crazy deep red color, I'm in wuv already. You just can't get a ginormous bowl of spicy fish anywhere for $13. This bowl would cost you close to $30 anywhere else and they barely give you enough fish to go around with 4 people let alone 1 fat fuck like me. I was scooping up the fish into my rice bowl and more fish was popping up from the bottom. I kept eating more fish and more fish was floating to the top like my dead goldfishes in my aquarium when I was a young Augustus Gloop. The fish was endless, it was amazing. I have never seen this much fish in this dish anywhere else, ever. This is a fucking keeper. I ate this dish for 3 days.

Fatty Pork (Belly) with Pickled Cabbage, $12 (previous $11). This is one of those dishes that got lost in translation. The real Chino version is ridiculously tasty and pleasant to look at. This dish was a sad sack of hamster vomit. I swear, if I threw up on top of this, it wouldn't show. It would just blend right in and may even make it taste better. We all love pork belly but not fucking boiled slices of gelatinous fatty mush. There was barely any pork, it was all belly fat. The real Chino pickled veg is green and tastes amazing but look at this sow smegma. It was too fermented and it shouldn't be drenched in chili oil... Someone was smoking crack when this order was submitted. Hell, even a FOB wouldn't eat this shit... This would be more torture than being smuggled inside a cargo container in the hull of an oil tanker for 2 months. Just don't fucking do it, ever. They let me down on this dish... Fuck, they should have removed this dish on the menu revamp. 

Bok Choy (Shanghai) with Mushrooms, $10 (previous $9). Naturally, I was going to order the incredible dry fried green beans like usual but I wanted to be adventurous and got the classic bok choy and shrooms. And I'm glad I did. Since, I got the fish in chili oil and that disgusting fatty pork belly, I needed something refreshing and clean and not heavy like the other dishes. This was a perfect balance. Nice big portion, too, naturally.

Beef Chowfun, $10. I just can't get enough of this dish. It is just so goddam satisfying.

This is one of the best Chinatown food court stalls let alone any food court. The prices have increased but the quality and portions have not. I love this place and posting this review is a gamble for my well-feed-being. So, don't fuck this up for me and everybody else... Yeah, I talking about you fucking Yelpers... Go to Panda Expwess, Tin Drum or PF Chang's, mofos. I was gonna say Hawkers, too, but I kinda like them in a slutty kinda way.

5385 New Peachtree Rd

Chamblee, GA 30340

Krog Bar Coal Fired Pizza

Da Pouch used to live down the street from Krog Steakbar, it was a pretty good resto, especially, with Kevin Rathbun's talent. But I haven't been back to this Peachtree Hills area for a long time. There was no reason to ever since I moved out of this heavily congested Peachtree Rd area.... Until now. When I hear there's a new artisan 'ZA joint using a coal-fired oven, I have to get a fix just like a junkie. I would even sell my XXL dad bod on Cheshire Bridge for a coal-fired taste. There's not many coal oven 'ZA joints in this one horse town... The only one I can think of is Max's Coal Oven and they are no Lombardi's in NYC. This Peachtree Hills area has become very pricey and the elitist demographics is more than delighted to have a fancy 'ZA joint to spend their unlimited loot on... Along with their demon spawns in tow. I like the cozy space and simple menu, it keeps the quality and control in check. They have a nice patio outside for the overflow and kids. The first thing I looked at was the oven... Have no idea what make it is but I didn't see any coals in it or near it. It looked like a UFO. If I had a coal-fired 'ZA oven, I would be bragging about it non-stop like 1982 Heather Locklear was my girlfriend... But I will settle for a lightly used Farrah Fawcett's 1976 poster.  

OK, enough of the small talk and foreplay... Let's get to the coal-fired 'ZA!

Old Fashioned, $16. Originally, I got the Negroni Sbagliato cocktail but it was so bitterly disgusting and un-imbibable, I had to send it back. I love Negroni's but that was a total garbage cocktail. The server and bartender was nice enough to swap it out for the OF... Which was much more drinkable. I forgot the name of their well whiskey but it was one I never heard of from Kentucky. It tasted fine.

Coal Roasted Artichoke Hearts, pangrattato, parmesan, $12. Basically, it's two artichoke hearts for $12... But it was well prepared and tasted pretty good with the lemon zest and juice. The pangrattato was practically nonexistent. Keep the drippings to smear your pizza crust or bread into... It's pretty tasty.

The Italian, provolone, prosciutto, coppa, mozzarella, Jamie's giardiniera, $16. Looks like they removed the arugula which was on the online menu but their online picture still shows arugula. A little peppery greens woulda been a nice touch for taste and color. Shit, it's not like arugula is so expensive. So, let's get back to this ginzo sando... Tis was truly meh. It is so boring looking, almost pathetic. Barely any filler of cheese, meats and giardiniera... It was all bread which was pretty decent after smearing in the artichoke lemon zest juice but it was basically bread service for $16. The filler ingredients were all tasteless snoozers... Was it vegan meat? I was excited to try the giardiniera because I love that pickled shit but it was literally a teaspoon full and it was barely pickled. If they didn't list it on the menu, you wouldn't even know it was in there. There is no fucking way a real guido would ever approve of this Eyetalian sando. Go to Nicky's Undefeated for a really good Italian on a Liscio's seeded roll for $10, it easily destroys this overpriced trash. Such a disappointment for a ridiculous $16.

The pizza comes in two sizes- 12 inch and 16 inch. Let's try a few of them out and see if it's worth the price. I got all the 12 inch 'ZAs... So, this fat fuck can try more pies.

Surf Clam, garlic, oregano, parsley, evoo, pecorino, lemon, $17/21. This ain't no Frank Pepe's white clam pie from New Haven, CT. Not even close. Look at all that bare empty crust. This was basically a giant toasted pita bread with sprinkles. Such an insult to Frank Pepe's nationally acclaimed and celebrated pie. Seriously, zoom in on the sprinkles... There is barely any chopped clams on there. And to claim it's surf clam is a total stretch... But does it really matter? The demographics here won't even know the difference if they topped it with frozen Manila clams. Shit, a 6.5 oz can of Snow's chopped clams is on sale for $1.00 at Walmart right now. Each slice had like two scrawny nuggets of chopped clam and it gets stuck in your teeth like the abductor muscle of a mussel. They should include two toothpicks with the lemon slices. The pie was so dry, flavorless and barely any pecorino or the other ingredients. This specimen is truly the epitome of a fugazi. $17 down the drain.

Divola, tomato, coppa, calabrian chili, mozzarella, $16/20. Isn't it spelled "Diavola"? WTF is a Divola? Maybe it's better they spell it wrong with the sight of this exhibit. What a mess. Did raccoons make this? That crust looks like cheap pizza chain dough... I asked the server what kind of flour they used. She had to asked the cooks and came back with "pizza dough". Someone fucking stab me in the eye with the one calabrian chili on the pie, now. But my eyeball went straight to the lovely char blister... Let's take a closer look.

The puffy char blister may be the only saving grace of this hideous Pizza the Hutt. The red sauce was vibrant but extremely bland and unseasoned. The coppa was fine but the delicate sweetness didn't really stand out in that soupy cheesy mix in that Boboli premade crust. The whole purpose of a Diavola 'ZA is the calabrian chili peppers that gives it the fruity, smoky and spicy notes but it barely had any on it. If you're drunk or high as a tweaker, this may be acceptable... Or maybe not.

Margherita, tomato, buffalo mozzarella, basil, $15/19. WTF happened to this? Oh, I know... Mofo dropped the damn pie coming out of the oven. Spilled all the sauce over the crust. How is this even acceptable to send out? Speaking of sauce, why is there so much fucking sauce in this bread bowl? The basil was added during the cooking process and shriveled up like a bad case of shrinkage during a polar bear plunge. The classic Margherita is loved by all for it simplicity and fresh flavorful ingredients but it is not simple to execute properly... And one look of this pie really shows the lack of attention to details. It is just plain sloppy and ugly to look at. The taste was equally sloppy with no balance. 

The upskirt was actually very nice with the proper char spots... But the dough was tough to chew and hard to pull apart... Even with all that tomato soup on top. They should have served this with a grilled cheese.

This visit was pretty much a disappointment. I felt totally ripped off. Especially, coming from a proven and successful chef and restaurateur. Nothing came together during the entire meal except for the artichokes. The table next to me ordered the K.R.O.G. with the fennel sausage and it was made just as sloppy as my Margherita. There were tiny bits of sausage sparsely sprinkled about like the surf clam pie and they ate the shit outta it and said it was so good... Yeah, I don't think so. They just wanted to convince themselves that anything from Kevin Rathbun will always be good. This proves most people have the palate of a billy goat. This is another one and done. No need for a revisit which makes me sad because fatsos love pizza.

349 Peachtree Hills Ave NE

Suite D-2

Atlanta, GA 30305

https://krsteakbar.com/krog-bar-coal-fired-pizza/

**Here's a prime example of a properly executed Napoletana 'ZA with the right ingredients... Guess where...

Margherita, tomato sauce, mozzarella, basil, buffalo mozzarella, romano, olive oil, garlic, $21. It's a big pie for the price of admission. Ask for extra fresh basil and chopped garlic... So damn guud I ate the entire pie... Pouch, you fat fuck! Thank you.

Perfectly manscaped upskirt... The 00 Caputo flour creates the perfect pull on the dough. Look at those char spots... Extra flava!

A real Eyetalian 'ZA oven... Cooks in less than 1 1/2 minzies.

Forza Forni... Squirt.

Pizza by Yandy's

Where the fuck have you been, Pouch? Did you die or got stuck on the toilet you fat chode? No no, this disgusting elephant seal have been craving NYC 'ZA, so I charged up the Rascal 1000 scooter and went on a crusade to find the elusive NY slice in this one horse town... If that is even possible. Sure, there is great Napoletana 'ZA found all over Atlanta. But the NY slice remains a blur in the wilds of ATL like bigfoot. Glide Pizza is very good and the closes version to NYC 'ZA. But it is pricey as fuck. C'mon, there's gotta be a NYC transplant that is slinging NYC 'ZA somewhere in this city. Let's twist and scoot and see where we end up... 

Somehow I ended up in Sandy Springs for some strange reason... Musta been all the cough syrup I was drinking for breakfast. I saw an Aldi and ran in to pick up a couple things. I came out and saw there was a Mexican market next door, Carniceria Los Pinos. I love Mexi-markets because they usually have some of the best taquerias that is authentic and affordable unlike the endless overpriced gringo Mexican't dumps found all over like Superica. If I hear another gringo order fucking ground beef on a flour tortilla with lettuce and shredded cheese I will IBS-D all over their plate. 

I waddled in and saw the taqueria straight in the back corner... I took 4 steps and did a full stop because in the corner of my eye I saw pizza pies in a small display case. Tacos and empanadas can wait... After I eat some 'ZA. I took a gander at the pies and they fucking looked legit! What sorcery is this? Where am I? Come to find out these guys are from da Bronx. Did god just answer my prayers after all these years? Oh, I got giddy as a braless school girl with perky nipples licking my chops staring at the 'ZA in that case. I have to try it out and wait, what, they also do Detroit 'ZA, too? Holy fuck, this must be a hallucination from the cough syrup. Damn, this fat fuck is going all in... Let's take a first look.

Simple menu = quality control. The prices are amazing. And it's crazy they have NYC and Detroit style. The only thing they don't have is the Grandma Pie but I will inquire.

Look at that 'ZA, that is a legit NYC crust. I wanted to get a whole pie, half cheese and half cup and char pepperoni... But they have a great special that's available all day, every day... 2 slices with 1 topping and a drink for $9.99. You can't beat that deal. SOLD! I didn't want a pie that was sitting around to heat up a couple of slices. I asked them if they had a regular cheese pie in the oven and sure enough they had a fresh one cooking. I got it with the real deal cup and char pepperoni because that's what you do when it's available.

Sweet baby Jesus... Look at that thing of beauty. That crust is perfect, so was the cheese melt. Some may say that NYC water is the key to a great crust but that's a myth, NYC magic water only works with bagels. You know it's authentic NYC 'ZA when it's served on a round paper plate. 

My god, look at that perfect pool of pepperoni grease in the curled cups. It could use a bit of char on the edges but I ain't complaining about this hot piece of ass. That char blister is just a bonus.

I couldn't take a picture while holding it up to let the classic orange grease drip off the tip but this is just as sexy. The cheese melt is consistent. The 'ZA sauce is a perfect balance of sweet, tangy and acidity. Pro-Tip: use the crust to mop up the orange grease which has so much flavor, it's very healthy, too. It also doubles as poo lube. This 'ZA is prolly the best NY slice I have had in this town. The crunch of the crisp crust... It tasted like I was back in NYC at John's or Scarr's... This shit is legit.

Upskirt is just classic NYC 'ZA. Thank god I didn't see a bunch of holes underneath.. No perforated pie pans, they are for suckaz. 

Supreme 'ZA, peperoni, sausage, ground beef, onions, mushroom, green peppers, small $14.99. Two slices just ain't enough for fatsos... I had to get a small fresh made loaded pie to see how the dough held up with all that crap on top... And yep, it held together well and the slices folded nicely as well. That NY style dough is legit and it was tasty.

I had to do it... Got a fresh whole Detroit. I didn't want a reheated slice because it would be all dried out which would just ruin the mood after that amazing NY slice... And I'm also a revolting fat slob.

Detroit Original, caramelized cheese crust, cheddar and mozzarella cheese, $19.99. Are you fucking kidding me? $20 for this ginormus pie? Yeah yeah, someone is gonna bitch about the proper cheese for Detroit 'ZA's but Wisconsin brick cheese is hard to come by in da ATL and pricey, so, most joints are going to be using a mixture of different cheeses (ie: jack, muenster, cheddar, mozz) to keep cost down.

Look at this glamour shot... All it's missing is neon lights, a laser background and a picture of a cat in the top left corner. Just gorgeous.

Fuck me, look at that perfect corner cheese crust. If the Titanic had a bow like this it wouldn't have sank. After I eat this entire pie, I will be sinking like a burlap sack of waterlogged manure. 

Side cheese crust. It's prolly one of the best parts of a Detroit. 

Look at that vibrant sauce and they topped it off with fresh basil after it comes out of the oven, never cook the basil. It looks thick and heavy but the dough is super fluffy and not greasy at all. The bright sauce, melty stringy cheese and airy dough comes together for the perfect bite. This is one of best Detroit specimens found in da ATL.

I was on the fence about reviewing this joint because the locals know all about it based on the crowd but I didn't want anyone else to find out about this place... But I had to post it because it's just too good to keep it a secret for my one fan and reader. It still seems so unreal that this dumpy hole in the wall in the corner of a carniceria is producing some of finest NYC and Detroit 'ZA in the entire city. Remember, this is not a review to compare the quality of this 'ZA to any other pizza, this review is strictly for the search of the best NYC slice outside of NYC... Who knows there may be another hidden NY slice unicorn in this one horse town. Oh shit, I totally forgot about the Grandma Pie... Don't worry, that will be the first thing I ask them on my next visit of many. And I also need to try the calzone and stromboli. 

Pump pump... SQUIRT! ...Do they sell underpants in here? Asking for a friend...

PS- I did go to the taqueria for a couple empanadas but they were all sold out... So, I got a horchata to wash all that 'ZA down. Jesus, no wonder why I am such a fat fuck.

6342 Roswell Rd NE

Atlanta, GA 30328

https://www.pizzabyyandys.com/