Royal China

This place have been on and off my shit list since the dawn of time. Their dim sum was decent once but haven't been for a long long time... Best BBQ is still king of dim sum which are made to order. Their regular menu in the past was decent enough if you needed a fix but they totally revamped the menu and dishes about a year or two ago. The new laminated menu is huge as in size (WxHxD) with very pretty colorful pictures of the dishes to make you wet in your mouth and underpants. I was totally taken off guard the last time I ate here for dinner like a year ago... It was fucking respectable and delicious.
Sadly, for reasons unknown, I haven't been back since... Until late one night recently after drinking all day where I found myself hangry and couldn't find a place open to eat at. Then I remembered this place kinda stayed open late because they're located in the heart of Mexico city. Got in there like at 10PM Tijuana time and there were still a bunch of slants eating in there... Score! I don't know who decided to put menu boards up on easels right at the front door with a picture of Bruce Lee smirking and holding up a fist like he just ripped the heart out of the Maharaja and saying "Fuck Yeah!"... But I like it. Don't fucking get rid of that shit, ever. Speaking of shit... Let's see if their grub will still impress or make me depress and shit my pants... With the amount of whiskey and nacho cheese I had earlier that may happen involuntary anyways.

Roast Duck. Wow, look at that shit.. It looked really fucking plump and juicy. I was fist pumping like Bruce Lee out front. What the fuck is going on up in this piece in the middle of the night with this glorious specimen? Who the fuck is behind the curtain, David Chang? The skin was lacquered beautifully, had just the right amount of crisp and the meat was tender and moist as fuck... It was damn guud. Or maybe it was the whiskey talking. Either way, I ate the fuck outta this fowl smelling shit.

Beef Chowfun. It looked marvelous like Fernando... Until I noticed the noodles, where the fuck were the noodles? Did Michael eat it all? It was all beef and bean sprouts, not that that was a bad thing but shit, the whole thing about chowfun is the fun! AKA the noodles. The noodle to beef ratio was like 1:3. I had to eat this with rice since it was basically a beef stir fry dish. This was no chowfun but I guess Fernando would say, it is better to look good than to taste good. I gotta say the flavor was spot on in this dish, but the noodle pulling was lacking... Really. Like not present at all in this dish or in my pants. Don't act like y'all don't know what happens when you drink a shitload of whiskey... Dicks.

Pork Belly, eggplant, string beans. Ok, this dish is basically a must on every visit. It is just a damn solid dish that won't fail you. The color, texture, flavor, savoriness and bite is all there. You can't get any better than this... And I'm starting to get a blood flow back with this specimen in my mouth.

Seafood Hot Pot. This bowl had almost everything in there. The ocean called... They're running out of everything. It was a hefty portion of scallops, shrimp, squid, fish and whatever else was underneath all that stuff. Make sure you mix it up well because you need to coat everything with that dericious savory jizzlobbery at the bottom.. Kinda like a seafood mask, a culinary version of the zombie mask. Scoop a couple of ladles full of this crap in a bowl into your rice bowl and you'll be loving your pouch long time in euphoria... Even when you find yourself on the porcelain bowl after a few more shots of whiskey. Why does everything tastes so guud when you're high on life with a little substance assist and buzzed as fuck driving around with sunglasses on in the middle of the night on The Buford Highway... Y'all prolly can guess why by now. I'm not that smart.

I would still stay away from the dim sum here but the regular menu items are still kicking ass so far since they made the changes. Keep that tasty shit up and I'll keep my drinking shit up and give you money like a Pavlovian dog in the middle of the night.

I drink and I eat things.

3295 Chamblee Dunwoody Rd
Chamblee, GA 30341