Rice Mac

Sometimes, you just get the itch for some full retard Americanized Chino slop... Well, most of the time it's because you're really drunk or hungover and that shit is like medicine in the middle of the night. Or you're just a poor college student looking to fill yer belly and don't give a shit what it taste like... Well, I got the perfect fobby place for you. The new Rice Mac (I Love Rice) recently opened in the old Pita House space that once catered to the student population that inhabited this area. Pita House was pretty much garbage overall but they had a following, prolly because it was pretty cheap and filling. So, what do you do to lure the same demographics... Open another cheap and filling spot. Fusion Chino grub is always the way to go... But Rice Mac ain't just another dumpy hole in the wall take-out joint, it's actually pretty nice inside from the tiles to the Edison light bulbs. The menu is pretty straight forward on all the classic fusion hits. Let's take a sneak peek and sample some vittles.

Kimchi Fried Chicken, seasoned in lightly spiced kimchi base. Too bad there was zero kimchi seasoning. The batter to chicken ratio was like 30:1... It was too puffy with tiny morsels of cheekan inside... Wait, did they get this ideal from the chickens in waffles at My Parents' Basement? Students, save your $5.50 and put it towards something else on the menu.

Lo Mein. The classic Americanized noodle dish that's right up there with Chop Suey (whatever the fuck that is). This dish is heavy and will fill your fat ass up in one sitting. It's not as greasy as I expected which made the noodles go down easier without the guilt. Could use a little more veggies but they do give you a shitload of chicken.

Kung Pao Chicken. George likes his cheekan spicy... Too bad it was as spicy as a can of Mountain Dew. The veggie mix was actually pretty good and fresh. The peanuts had just the right texture, blanched just a bit to soften it up. It could be a lot spicier but they do give you a shitload of chicken.

Singapore Noodles. No char siu pork in sight... At least they used the right mei fun for this dish which made me happy but there wasn't enough curry powder, bell peppers and onions to balance it out. You can forget about finding any chili peppers, peas, fish sauce or cilantro in there. I opted for the chicken instead of the shrimp because I have been on a cheekan kick lately. Shit, when am I not on a cheekan kick. This was like all the other dishes sampled which tasted as expected... But they do give you a shitload of chicken.

Sesame Chicken. The infamous cousin to the General Tso's cheekan. The factory battered nuggets were as expected, bready and small chicken pieces inside. The HFCS sauce was spot on with it's sweetness and cloying factor. The silly piece of broccoli and sesame seeds finished off this dish. This is your perfect Gwai-lo'd version of the sesame cheekan. After a few bites, this got real tiresome real quick. All in moderation with this dish... But they do give you a shitload of frozen deep fried cheekan nuggets.

Spring Rolls. Your standard issue veggie rolls but they were hot and crispy at least.

Wonton, Hot & Sour Soup. Oh, man these were so bad... It's just so full of processed ingredients that were flavorless and so bad for you... Unless you're still fucked up from the night before or this morning. The hot & sour was neither hot or sour... Just warm and neutral. The wonton dough was thick and the sawdust like filler sparse... Just like every wonton soup found in all the hole in the wall Chino joints, where do they source these wontons? I gotta know! It really is an ancient Chinese secret.

Mushroom, Miso Soup.  And I thought the other two were bad... The shroom soup was just instant broth with thin slices of real mushrooms at least, it looks like a beef broth but tasted like nothing, not even MSG. The miso soup was also instant which you can tell right away from the funky finish. It's perfectly fine to make the instant stuff in your dorm room but one would expect a little better here, wait, nevermind. The soups come with the entrees so there's really nothing you can do about that,  maybe they can sub it out for another crispy spring roll, instead.

They're good eggs here... But this isn't Asian food, this is fusion filler food. You do get a full meal at a decent price which is great for students and drunks alike. They are providing an essential service to the community. What that exactly is I have no fucking clue but I do like how clean the place is and watching them cook every dish to order. No one is expecting rainbows and unicorns here but it's affordable and it will definitely fill you up if you're in the mood for some sloppy gloppy fusion grub. Stick with the main dishes where they actually have to use real meat and cook it, the frozen nugget stuff is pretty much junk. I don't know if I would be back anytime soon but I wouldn't say no to it if I was out drinking heavily the night before... Like my dumb ass would know or taste the difference in that state. My daddy always said, Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son... But hey, at least they do give you a shitload of chicken.

2050 N Decatur Rd
Decatur, GA 30033
404-963-1266
http://www.ricemacs.com/