I have never been a big fan of KFC... The pressure fryer style fwied cheekan is just too soft and greasy while their extra crispy has way too much breading on it. They say it's coated like 7+ times and that's just too thick to try to hide the tiny piece of chicken inside... That's like trying to impress a chick wearing 7 condoms over a Vienna sausage. But no chicken chain has done the trendy hot chicken, let alone a Nashville hot chicken, yet... Until now. I gotta admit, they got some balls to do a promo like this since most pedestrians can't handle heat or spicy of any sort, especially, on a national level. Just for growing a pair and doing something trendy before any other chicken chains, you got my attention and deserve another chance... Even though, they will never top Popeyes no matter what they do. Shit, I'm hoping it sucks ass so I can destroy their ass in the only fashion the pouch knows how... With delicate crass and vulgar verbiage in the most immature nature, of course. Were you expecting a PR fluff piece from a free media event coming from this unrefined face gash?
Ok, enough with the verbal foreplay... Let's just get right down to the chicken fisting. Jesus, that reminds me of this kid in middle school telling me about how him and his cousins would fuck bantams and biddies until they died of a heart attack back in the Dominican Republic... I mean, talk about a hot marinade injection. It still haunts me to know why some kid would risk his developing manhood with large sharp talons flailing around in the general vicinity of his franks and beans. Luckily, these hot cheekans have been declawed and deep fried...
Warning label... "Warning: You are about to taste the BEST SPICY CHICKEN YOU'VE EVER HAD." ...I don't know about that but your fucking coleslaw is pretty damn good, though. Always been a fan of their coleslaw, must be all the HFCS and Molly in it.
Voila! An extra crispy leg and thigh dipped in their "Nashville" hot sauce... You can see some of it pooling in the bottom of the container, perhaps a good sign? These motherfuckers even threw in a few slices of pickles to complete the original look... Except for the biscuit vs. a slice of white bread. I asked them if they just have them by the piece but sadly, they only come in a package deal of 1 breast, 2 piece leg and thigh or a 8 piece mixed. No matter, the leg and thigh is what I wanted anyways. This entire set up was only $5 and change which wasn't too bad... And I'm still staring at the hot sauce puddled at the bottom which was kinda impressive. I rolled the leg around the sauce to give it a nice shiny coating... Took a bite, crispy and crackling crust, the hot sauce was almost non-existent on the first contact and it started to build up a little after a few seconds but it ended up just mildly spicy on the finish. Not that it was bad, it would be spicy to 93% of the population, so it looks like they have done their job on the heat level for the masses. For me, I wanted to add more hot sauce on it but I didn't because I needed to report the truth back to my one reader unadulterated and unaltered... Even though, I prefer my chicks bathe in red hot liquid chicken sex. I gotta admit, it was surprisingly decent for their attempt to reproduce the famed N'ville hot chicken. It's got the look to it but it still fell short on the overall taste and heat level... But they have earned a little piece of my respect back. Not that I would rush back for more but if I was driving by on the same side as a KFC, I may stop in and try the Nashville hot cheekan tenders version... But that's all dependent on how much fucking whiskey I have had already.
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