Village Burger

I can't believe I'm saying this but Main Street in Tucker is kinda cute and has that homey small town feel. It kinda reminds me of Punxsutawney in Groundhogs Day because every once in awhile you can spot a giant rodent like creasture named Phil drinking a beer at the Local 7... I think he saw his shadow and scurried back into his hellhole and then Snowpocalypse befell upon Atlanta last week. Now, the snow has cleared, the milk and bread supply has been exhausted and it's time for da Pouch to venture out to scavenge for food. There's a handful of eateries on this stretch... Matthews Cafeteria has been around for a long time and a local favorite, a Mexican't joint, a growler spot, M572 which closed not too long ago and replaced by the Freakin Incan, and the newly opened Village Burger. I have never been to this burger joint since they're located out in the boonies of Dunwoody and Johns Creek. Ok, the new Tucker location is not exactly close to the city but it's their closest location without dealing with a ton of traffic and distance. 
It looks kinda small from the outside but once you go inside, it's quite roomy. It's the standard slaughter house concept- get in line, order at the counter, get a number, find a table and wait to be fed. The grub comes out pretty quickly but that's not a surprise, since the kitchen looked like it was running in 6th gear, humming along nicely. I thought my fat body sack would blend in here with the other fat fucks grazing in here but the patrons were not as obeast as I thought initially... Don't get me wrong here, there were a few oinkers guzzling down burgers like Wimpy on a Saturday but there were also a lot of high school type kids and families here, too. Time to fill up this abyss of a marsupial pouch with little Joey burgers, let's take a gander...

Chicken Tenders. The tenders are a little on the thin side but the crust was crispy and not too thick which made up for the size. But they give you a nice portion of it. I wished they had better sauces to dip these little chippies into. Not bad but I don't know if I would get them again.

Chicago Dog, topped with mustard, relish, onion, pickle, tomato, sport peppers and celery salt. Dude, I think there's two wieners on that bun... I mowed the garden down to the side and there sure was two pizzle skin flutes in there. What the fuck is this about? This musta been a mistake.. But I ain't gonna open my fat snout about it except to inhale this double hog. The dogs tasted like bland cheapo wieners from Piggly Wiggly... Ikea's hot dogs have more flavor than these things. The bun was so overloaded with all that crap on top you could barely eat it.. But make no mistake, this was not a Chicago Dog whatsoever. I wanted to ask them if they had chopsticks to eat this with... But then I remember I had a travel foldable pair on me, never leave home without it. Skip this Chicago fraud.

House Burger. Their basic burger. You can pile as much free shit on there as you please but why? Just keep it simple with the basics so you can actually taste the burger itself. It's an acceptable burger, it was seasoned ok and it wasn't dried out, really nothing to write home about, but it works for them and their target audience. It ain't gonna win any awards but all the 5 year olds in here gave it a thumbs up. See? Screw you Pouch and your fancypants taste, our local VIPs love it and now, we're.. Vindicated! I just got kicked in the nads by kindergartners... Bless your heart, Village Burger.

Onion Rings & Fried Pickles. You can do a half and half of basically anything on their sides menu which is nice. Both the rings and pickles were pretty good... Seems like their sides are better than the mains here.

It's totally acceptable to grab a quick Village burger and other snacks here every now and then... Even for a rotund village idiot like me that will eat anything, but I must admit, I would be back only if I was in the area and nothing else was open. Let's face it, burger joints like this are a dime a dozen and there's one on every corner. Shit, even Flip Burger with the celebrity name and money behind it has basically closed all their stores including their primo Buckhead location that just bit the dust quietly. I like to support local restos but it's just not craveworthy enough to get me back here on a weekly or even monthly basis but for this cozy little Main street and the locals that live around here, this little burger joint may just do it for them.

2329 Main St.
Tucker, GA 30084
http://villageburger.com/