Holy mackerel... where am I???!!!
I swear I saw Sanford and Leftout Lamont working in the garage next door. It's a wacky area to get to for interlopers and even for some ITP'ers but once you get here it's all worth it. It feels comfortable, it feels like home. The covered patio area and the outdoor patio is like the forest moon of Endor. Throw a couple of Ewoks back there and it's all good.
The grub ain't fancy schmancy but tasty and straight forward seafood with a southern twist.
Fried Calamari- Surprisingly good for an obligatory menu item found on every single resto in Atlanta. It included not only the rings but tentacles as well. Flashed fwied to order and came out crispy and hot. Nice.
Lump Crab Cakes- The only lump that can be found was in my throat after taking one bite. That shit was pulverized to sawdust, bland and flatter than a 70 yr old woman chest. It was like fishy flapjacks... Snorkel! STAT! The spicy Cajun remoulade was Sambal Oelek mixed in with mayo... Blech.
Fisherman's Stew- Their "signature stew" was a forgery... tiny frozen bay scallops, baby shrimp and leftover fish bits in a "spicy" tomato broth. I had V8 spicier than this. I wouldn't put John's Hand on this Crockpot special.
Wahoo- The grilled medallions of Wahoo was cooked well but a bit bland. The fresh salsa verde was too watery and leaked all over the plate... Linda Blair anyone? Buttermilk mashed potatoes was the same old hat you find anywhere. The fresh vegetables turns out to be the veggie of the day (haricot vert) and not a medley.
The Trout and Tuna that my friends had look pretty good but I busted a gut when I noticed it was the exact plating as every other dish in the whole entire resto... It's like the Henry Ford of kitchens.
The grub overall wasn't bad, it was quite tasty but the plating was so 80's French chic... Yawn. I have seen better plating with plastic food displays in the front window in Little Italy. But I like this place because it's a n'hood joint with local business owners. I would definitely come back here and support them.
I need a dwink... where's my ripple you big dummy?!
Gulp.
1042 West College Avenue
Decatur, GA 30030 (404) 373-3331
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Makara's Mediterranean
With all the Section 8 moving into Sandy Spwings Inc., you would think Church's Fwied Chicken would be the last joint to go belly up at this high traffic location.
Instead, the Gweek Gods bent over and replaced drumsticks with gyros... Hey, who doesn't like a piece of juicy meat stuffed between a fluffy pita bwead? A squirt of some creamy tzatziki really helps you swallow down that meat log... Only if they allow that during the Mustard Belt.
Menu is super simple and cheap... $5.50 for gyros and cheesesteaks? Hades yeah!!!
The pita wasn't homemade but it was still airy and fresh. The gyro meat was shaved on the spot in front of you and it was very tasty...meat always taste better fweshly shaved. The tzatziki was zesty and feta crumbled nicely on top. Not a bad gyro at all.
They also got dolmas, hummus, baklava, gweek salad, lentil soup, kebabs and $10 combo plates of chicken, lamb or beef.
Just a good place to grab a quick bite for those on the go! But I kinda miss all the chicken bones in the parking lot though... so, I poured one for the homies.
Splash.
6224 Roswell Road
Atlanta, GA 30328
Instead, the Gweek Gods bent over and replaced drumsticks with gyros... Hey, who doesn't like a piece of juicy meat stuffed between a fluffy pita bwead? A squirt of some creamy tzatziki really helps you swallow down that meat log... Only if they allow that during the Mustard Belt.
Menu is super simple and cheap... $5.50 for gyros and cheesesteaks? Hades yeah!!!
The pita wasn't homemade but it was still airy and fresh. The gyro meat was shaved on the spot in front of you and it was very tasty...meat always taste better fweshly shaved. The tzatziki was zesty and feta crumbled nicely on top. Not a bad gyro at all.
They also got dolmas, hummus, baklava, gweek salad, lentil soup, kebabs and $10 combo plates of chicken, lamb or beef.
Just a good place to grab a quick bite for those on the go! But I kinda miss all the chicken bones in the parking lot though... so, I poured one for the homies.
Splash.
6224 Roswell Road
Atlanta, GA 30328
Top Flr
Sometimes, ugly babies do grow up looking purdy guud... mebbe except for Rocky Dennis.
Time did heal Top Flr after all! Especially the grub here. I was pleasantly surprised to see another friend of mine cooking here when I walked in. I had a good feeling the grub would be totally different this time and it was... not that Mike Schorn didn't put out tasty grub, he just couldn't do it solo in a full house.
The pappardelle with duck confit was verra tastee. The wide thin pasta was cooked perfectly... I call it "al dentata" because it had a bit of tooth to it. The duck confit was plentiful as were the shaved parmesan... hey, who doesn't like it shaved? Just a very solid dish. Yum.
I was told the chorizo pizza was a must try... even though everyone knows I prefer NYC style 'ZA, but this was decent. The ingredients were good but the meats was just a tad dried out under the heat. The dough was fluffy as a cloud... the Care Bears would love it.
I do like being on Top but I think I prefer to stay on the Bottom at this joint... The new bar/room is so chic and the dwinks come out full and cold and the gwub comes out nice and hot.
Burp!
674 Myrtle St NE
Atlanta, GA 30308
(404) 685-3110
Time did heal Top Flr after all! Especially the grub here. I was pleasantly surprised to see another friend of mine cooking here when I walked in. I had a good feeling the grub would be totally different this time and it was... not that Mike Schorn didn't put out tasty grub, he just couldn't do it solo in a full house.
The pappardelle with duck confit was verra tastee. The wide thin pasta was cooked perfectly... I call it "al dentata" because it had a bit of tooth to it. The duck confit was plentiful as were the shaved parmesan... hey, who doesn't like it shaved? Just a very solid dish. Yum.
I was told the chorizo pizza was a must try... even though everyone knows I prefer NYC style 'ZA, but this was decent. The ingredients were good but the meats was just a tad dried out under the heat. The dough was fluffy as a cloud... the Care Bears would love it.
I do like being on Top but I think I prefer to stay on the Bottom at this joint... The new bar/room is so chic and the dwinks come out full and cold and the gwub comes out nice and hot.
Burp!
674 Myrtle St NE
Atlanta, GA 30308
(404) 685-3110
Pollo Brassa
Oh, there's definitely yardbirds here... But it ain't Peruvian style. Hell, it ain't even Puerto Rican style.
I was excited to see something "ethnic" go into the old Giorgio's Pizzeria spot but I was quickly deflated when I noticed they spelled "Brassa" instead of Brasa. I knew the jig was up when the entire staff were all from lower Chattanooga... aka Causasians. And the "rotisserie" was filled with nothing... No smell of Smoke, Fire or Chicken. Just a small pile of tinder laying on the ground or was it their kid's Lincoln Logs. Where am I???!!! But situations like this never gets between Gastro and ghetto pigeons in his belly...
Very simple menu of whole, half, quarter chicken, chicken sammies, salads and sides.
The roasted chicken was white but kinda dry, zero flavor/spice/zest, flappy old skin and greezy bottom. Eh, looks like some old bird you find at a nursing home. It just seemed like it was yesterday's leftovers (no wonder the rotisserie wasn't running). It came with some yellowish mayo smegma that had absolutely zero taste... why?
Chicken Salad sammie was Aldi's finest. This scoop of bland white mess was pulverized to the Point of No Return. I had spicier vanilla ice cream. I couldn't tell if there were any meat between the buns... kinda like the girl in front of me. I shoulda known better to order the same thing from a broad who looked like Bridget Fonda... right down to the chicken legs. Oy.
Peruvian Corn tasted fresh... from a can with a couple pinches of Old Bay. I have seen bigger corn kernels on a foot. I shoulda left this "side" item on the side of the road to die. The portion was even more pathetic... 1 full tablespoon. When did canned corn become pricier than gas?
Yuca Fwies were more like fwied cubes. But I must admit they were crispy and tender inside but bland. I can ring out more flavor from an old geezer's sock.
Yellow Rice tasted like it came outta the Yellow River... wet, overcooked to mush, green peas only Linda Blair could love. This is one for the denture crew.
Fwesh Handcut Fwies might had been hand cut but it was oily and limp like a seagull after the Exxon Valdez spill. Guess they missed frying 101.
Given that they are brand spanking new and very nice... another trip is required (b/c I stole some coupons behind the counter). But based on mere first impressions, they are not going for authenticity but more for the chicken heads in that area with pedestrian palates.
2.5 stars.
Cuckoo Cuckoo!
857 Collier Rd
Atlanta, GA 30318
(404) 350-0105
I was excited to see something "ethnic" go into the old Giorgio's Pizzeria spot but I was quickly deflated when I noticed they spelled "Brassa" instead of Brasa. I knew the jig was up when the entire staff were all from lower Chattanooga... aka Causasians. And the "rotisserie" was filled with nothing... No smell of Smoke, Fire or Chicken. Just a small pile of tinder laying on the ground or was it their kid's Lincoln Logs. Where am I???!!! But situations like this never gets between Gastro and ghetto pigeons in his belly...
Very simple menu of whole, half, quarter chicken, chicken sammies, salads and sides.
The roasted chicken was white but kinda dry, zero flavor/spice/zest, flappy old skin and greezy bottom. Eh, looks like some old bird you find at a nursing home. It just seemed like it was yesterday's leftovers (no wonder the rotisserie wasn't running). It came with some yellowish mayo smegma that had absolutely zero taste... why?
Chicken Salad sammie was Aldi's finest. This scoop of bland white mess was pulverized to the Point of No Return. I had spicier vanilla ice cream. I couldn't tell if there were any meat between the buns... kinda like the girl in front of me. I shoulda known better to order the same thing from a broad who looked like Bridget Fonda... right down to the chicken legs. Oy.
Peruvian Corn tasted fresh... from a can with a couple pinches of Old Bay. I have seen bigger corn kernels on a foot. I shoulda left this "side" item on the side of the road to die. The portion was even more pathetic... 1 full tablespoon. When did canned corn become pricier than gas?
Yuca Fwies were more like fwied cubes. But I must admit they were crispy and tender inside but bland. I can ring out more flavor from an old geezer's sock.
Yellow Rice tasted like it came outta the Yellow River... wet, overcooked to mush, green peas only Linda Blair could love. This is one for the denture crew.
Fwesh Handcut Fwies might had been hand cut but it was oily and limp like a seagull after the Exxon Valdez spill. Guess they missed frying 101.
Given that they are brand spanking new and very nice... another trip is required (b/c I stole some coupons behind the counter). But based on mere first impressions, they are not going for authenticity but more for the chicken heads in that area with pedestrian palates.
2.5 stars.
Cuckoo Cuckoo!
857 Collier Rd
Atlanta, GA 30318
(404) 350-0105
Monday, September 22, 2008
La Fonda Latina
Aretha Franklin might had been treated mean and treated cruel but... This chain made a fool of me... Twice.
No wonder I don't eat Latin grub intown often. Everything is just so bland and pedestrian. This wannabe Cuban and Mexi-joint is perfect grub for the suburban gringo who thinks Taco Mac is an export from Mexico. If it doesn't come with lettuce, tomatoes, orange shredded cheez and a crunch... it ain't a taco.
Like most dumb down Latin chain restos, they are notorious for lighting fast speed and service... Take your order, bring out the food and disappear for the rest of the night. Hell, you know it's made in America when all the servers are dress like Speedy Gonzalez with the really bad Mexican't accent. They wanna get you in and out fast and head home because the grub will make you run for the border... Twice.
Chips and Salsa might as well be Fritos and Rotel... It would be spicier!
Artichoke Cheez Dip can make Art dip his chip in cheez and choke. Did they use bleu cheez or was it just moldy? It seemed like it sat in a cave for weeks.
Paella was Mexican Fwied Wice served in a cold cast iron pan. Chico and Chang's laughs at them. No crispy yum yums on the bottom... I think they used Pam spray. I wanted to throw this outta the Pella window.
What's with the oven mitts when this pan was colder than my cerveza? Was it all just for show? ....Sho'nuff, Fo'sho!
Veggie Enchilada is best when accompanied by a number to the left of it. Who wants to pronounce 6 syllables in a foreign tongue when you can order with your fingers on one hand? Oh wait, silly me, enchiladas are not made in Mexico... but Idaho. Yes, I da ho because I just sold out coming here.
I know I wouldn't come here for the food... but the view ain't too shabby. There's a lot of hot mess and pink fury up in this piece. Just go next door for decent 'ZA and enjoy a slice of pie while watching some as well.
Ay chihuahua... 2.5 Stars.
ZIPPP!
2813 Peachtree Rd NE
Atlanta, GA 30305
(404) 816-8311
No wonder I don't eat Latin grub intown often. Everything is just so bland and pedestrian. This wannabe Cuban and Mexi-joint is perfect grub for the suburban gringo who thinks Taco Mac is an export from Mexico. If it doesn't come with lettuce, tomatoes, orange shredded cheez and a crunch... it ain't a taco.
Like most dumb down Latin chain restos, they are notorious for lighting fast speed and service... Take your order, bring out the food and disappear for the rest of the night. Hell, you know it's made in America when all the servers are dress like Speedy Gonzalez with the really bad Mexican't accent. They wanna get you in and out fast and head home because the grub will make you run for the border... Twice.
Chips and Salsa might as well be Fritos and Rotel... It would be spicier!
Artichoke Cheez Dip can make Art dip his chip in cheez and choke. Did they use bleu cheez or was it just moldy? It seemed like it sat in a cave for weeks.
Paella was Mexican Fwied Wice served in a cold cast iron pan. Chico and Chang's laughs at them. No crispy yum yums on the bottom... I think they used Pam spray. I wanted to throw this outta the Pella window.
What's with the oven mitts when this pan was colder than my cerveza? Was it all just for show? ....Sho'nuff, Fo'sho!
Veggie Enchilada is best when accompanied by a number to the left of it. Who wants to pronounce 6 syllables in a foreign tongue when you can order with your fingers on one hand? Oh wait, silly me, enchiladas are not made in Mexico... but Idaho. Yes, I da ho because I just sold out coming here.
I know I wouldn't come here for the food... but the view ain't too shabby. There's a lot of hot mess and pink fury up in this piece. Just go next door for decent 'ZA and enjoy a slice of pie while watching some as well.
Ay chihuahua... 2.5 Stars.
ZIPPP!
2813 Peachtree Rd NE
Atlanta, GA 30305
(404) 816-8311
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Eros World Tapas Bar
Since Piebar never got me excited with their nasty pies...
Should I be aroused at a place named Eros? Sure, why not... I'm secure with my Gastro-ality. Plus, it's located in a colorful part of town where you can get a pink taco under a cabana or finger something loose, round and heavy and toss it in a gutter behind the alley scoring a 69.69. It's your world, do what you want, I'm only living in it.
So, the snarky snacker and I had to see what all the fuss was about since reading all the positive reviews on the intertubes. Ok, I admit, it was my 3rd choice since The Porter was closed b/c they ran out of beer and grub (WTF?)... and La Pietra Cucina couldn't figure if they wanted to open or not on a Monday (WTF2?), try spinning a bottle of douche!
Alright, the interior design is a lot nicer and softer... but I can really give two pumps of my bow string about that. I was there for the grubbery and it had my arrow standing at attention and spread eagle... my wings that is! Tapas style plates were inexpensive and well prepared. The most expensive thing was the Paella for 2 @ $20 which really isn't that bad, next time!
The server had on a low cut top and hot shorts which was kinda weird outfit for a resto early in the evening... even if she could pull it off. I can understand mebbe after 10pm you switch to "Ho" wear but not when I'm eating gwilled octopus pweez! She was dumber than John Stamos. I swear, it was like her first time reading the menu and wine list... it really was all Gweek to her! "Grilled what?", "Chicken what?", "What kinda chops?", "Which wine?", "Can you point to which one?"... What a tool! Excuse me, but is there a sharpening stone in the back? Nevermind her... how's the grub?
Grilled Baby Octopus - A plate full of tender and juicy cephalopods... David Arquette ain't got nothing on these eight legged freaks! Just don't stroke them too hard or else they might squirt you in the eye.
Lamb Chops - Perfectly cooked med-rare pieces of yum yums in my belly... the tzatziki sauce was very good. Mary had a little lamb... "had". Exactly.
Spanish Potatoes - Were crispy and light... tasty but the spicy tomato sauce wasn't all that though. Needed more zing, ding dongs!
Chicken Livers & Toast with Peri Peri Sauce - I really liked this dish, balanced flavors and just cooked well overall. It was a generous helping of offal... offally good!
Curry Veggie Samosas - Nice and crispy but the curry flavor could be a bit more present. It needed a dipping sauce... c'mon, everyone needs a lil throat lube to swallow, even Joey Chestnut.
This Genie Lamp shaped joint really rubbed me the right way with their grub that Christina Aguilera never could... even though it looks so much like a nightclub on the Jersey shore. The new Gweek owners will definitely turn a few hard core foodies on... Just don't bend over to pick up the menu on the floor. Leave that for the servers in hot shorts that just came from Flashers.
OPA! ...Eta Pi!
Burp!
2160 Monroe Drive
Atlanta, GA 30324 (404) 549-2433
Should I be aroused at a place named Eros? Sure, why not... I'm secure with my Gastro-ality. Plus, it's located in a colorful part of town where you can get a pink taco under a cabana or finger something loose, round and heavy and toss it in a gutter behind the alley scoring a 69.69. It's your world, do what you want, I'm only living in it.
So, the snarky snacker and I had to see what all the fuss was about since reading all the positive reviews on the intertubes. Ok, I admit, it was my 3rd choice since The Porter was closed b/c they ran out of beer and grub (WTF?)... and La Pietra Cucina couldn't figure if they wanted to open or not on a Monday (WTF2?), try spinning a bottle of douche!
Alright, the interior design is a lot nicer and softer... but I can really give two pumps of my bow string about that. I was there for the grubbery and it had my arrow standing at attention and spread eagle... my wings that is! Tapas style plates were inexpensive and well prepared. The most expensive thing was the Paella for 2 @ $20 which really isn't that bad, next time!
The server had on a low cut top and hot shorts which was kinda weird outfit for a resto early in the evening... even if she could pull it off. I can understand mebbe after 10pm you switch to "Ho" wear but not when I'm eating gwilled octopus pweez! She was dumber than John Stamos. I swear, it was like her first time reading the menu and wine list... it really was all Gweek to her! "Grilled what?", "Chicken what?", "What kinda chops?", "Which wine?", "Can you point to which one?"... What a tool! Excuse me, but is there a sharpening stone in the back? Nevermind her... how's the grub?
Grilled Baby Octopus - A plate full of tender and juicy cephalopods... David Arquette ain't got nothing on these eight legged freaks! Just don't stroke them too hard or else they might squirt you in the eye.
Lamb Chops - Perfectly cooked med-rare pieces of yum yums in my belly... the tzatziki sauce was very good. Mary had a little lamb... "had". Exactly.
Spanish Potatoes - Were crispy and light... tasty but the spicy tomato sauce wasn't all that though. Needed more zing, ding dongs!
Chicken Livers & Toast with Peri Peri Sauce - I really liked this dish, balanced flavors and just cooked well overall. It was a generous helping of offal... offally good!
Curry Veggie Samosas - Nice and crispy but the curry flavor could be a bit more present. It needed a dipping sauce... c'mon, everyone needs a lil throat lube to swallow, even Joey Chestnut.
This Genie Lamp shaped joint really rubbed me the right way with their grub that Christina Aguilera never could... even though it looks so much like a nightclub on the Jersey shore. The new Gweek owners will definitely turn a few hard core foodies on... Just don't bend over to pick up the menu on the floor. Leave that for the servers in hot shorts that just came from Flashers.
OPA! ...Eta Pi!
Burp!
2160 Monroe Drive
Atlanta, GA 30324 (404) 549-2433
Hemingway's Tropical Bar and Grill
Dear Ernie...
"We all ought to make sacrifices for literature. Look at me. I'm going to Hemingway's without a protest. All for literature."
... And literature was the Bulldogs.
"Never write about a place until you're away from it, because that gives you perspective"
... I have never been more perspective in my life since I left.
"Fear of death increases in exact proportion to increase in wealth."
... In this case, wealth is every mile further away from midtown.
"About morals, I know only that what is moral is what you feel good after and what is immoral is what you feel bad after."
... And this joint has no morals, especially for my bowels.
True to it's name, Scarietta Square is proof positive that senior citizens to Emos can live in hellacious harmony. Hell, I would be emotionally depwessed as well if I lived here. This joint spews not one ounce of literary prowess but instead gallons of Mad Libs spooge. Walking down to the basement bathroom makes me want to place lotion on it's skin in fear of getting the hose again. Was it a coincidence that Lynyrd Skynyrd was playing in the background...
Ooh, ooh that smell
Can't you smell that smell?
Ooh, ooh that smell
The smell of spunk surrounds you.
They proudly state, "You may find that the spirit of Hemingway permeates the environment... in an enchanting Key West atmosphere."
... The only thing that permeates the environment here is the enchanting stench of hamster vomit from the basement since 1993.
"The world is a fine place and worth fighting for and I hate very much to leave it."
... To Hemingway's, I have four words: A Farewell to Arms.
Abercrombie & Fitch's shotgun goes...
BOO-YA!!!
29 W Park Sq NE
Marietta, GA 30060 (770) 427-5445
"We all ought to make sacrifices for literature. Look at me. I'm going to Hemingway's without a protest. All for literature."
... And literature was the Bulldogs.
"Never write about a place until you're away from it, because that gives you perspective"
... I have never been more perspective in my life since I left.
"Fear of death increases in exact proportion to increase in wealth."
... In this case, wealth is every mile further away from midtown.
"About morals, I know only that what is moral is what you feel good after and what is immoral is what you feel bad after."
... And this joint has no morals, especially for my bowels.
True to it's name, Scarietta Square is proof positive that senior citizens to Emos can live in hellacious harmony. Hell, I would be emotionally depwessed as well if I lived here. This joint spews not one ounce of literary prowess but instead gallons of Mad Libs spooge. Walking down to the basement bathroom makes me want to place lotion on it's skin in fear of getting the hose again. Was it a coincidence that Lynyrd Skynyrd was playing in the background...
Ooh, ooh that smell
Can't you smell that smell?
Ooh, ooh that smell
The smell of spunk surrounds you.
They proudly state, "You may find that the spirit of Hemingway permeates the environment... in an enchanting Key West atmosphere."
... The only thing that permeates the environment here is the enchanting stench of hamster vomit from the basement since 1993.
"The world is a fine place and worth fighting for and I hate very much to leave it."
... To Hemingway's, I have four words: A Farewell to Arms.
Abercrombie & Fitch's shotgun goes...
BOO-YA!!!
29 W Park Sq NE
Marietta, GA 30060 (770) 427-5445
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Cafe 101
Until recently, I was still having nightmares of Chuck Norris making sloppy pies in this Octagon outhouse that once was a pizzeria. Yes, I ate that crap they called a pizza and it haunted me ever since. Hell, I had better 'ZA at Frank Ma's South. Chuck Norris realized enough was enough and roundhouse kicked this place so hard, it became a Chinese restaurant. And the world rejoiced in unison... or die.
Szechuan/Taiwanese grub is hard to find ITP (besides Frank Ma)... Tasty China is way up in Scarietta, Sichuan House is in the Bloomin' Onions fields of Norcross, Bento Cafe is in traffic hell of Jimmy Carter and Taipei just closed unexpectedly. So having this joint ITP (barely) is a Chucksend. That's why I pray to Chuck Norris every night before supper and bed. The menu is extensive, inexpensive and full of tasty tidbits. Even their Chino-American dishes seemed to be prepared better... well, take a look next door at China Bistro and guess why.
Cucumber in Chili Oil - Nice little app to get the palate going, light, a tad sweet and not spicy at all.
Szechuan Dan Dan Noodles - The noodles are tasty but the sauce needs to be a lot spicier... delish nonetheless. A couple spoonfuls of chili paste did the twick.
Leeks and Smoked Pork - Everything is better with bacon. You can substitute the leeks with poison ivy and it would still taste good.
Winter Melon Clam Soup - It doesn't have to be cold outside to eat soup. This was so light and delicate but the flavors really comes through with the first sip. Tons of ginger, winter melons and little neck clams. Yum.
Duck w/ Mustard Green Claypot - Totally threw me off with this dish. It was more like a noodle soup. Great flavor from the duck but yet light to the taste and the hint of bitterness from the mustard greens balanced it out.
Alongside with bubble teas, shaved ice and milk teas... they used to secretly sell bottles of Chuck Norris' urine... now, it's available widely today under the name Red Bull.
I kinda like eating in this kitschy Chinese carousel... but it would be even better if Chuck Norris roundhouse kick this ride to the tune of carnival music.
HAY-YA!!!
5412 Buford Hwy NE
Atlanta, GA 30340 (770) 458-8883
Szechuan/Taiwanese grub is hard to find ITP (besides Frank Ma)... Tasty China is way up in Scarietta, Sichuan House is in the Bloomin' Onions fields of Norcross, Bento Cafe is in traffic hell of Jimmy Carter and Taipei just closed unexpectedly. So having this joint ITP (barely) is a Chucksend. That's why I pray to Chuck Norris every night before supper and bed. The menu is extensive, inexpensive and full of tasty tidbits. Even their Chino-American dishes seemed to be prepared better... well, take a look next door at China Bistro and guess why.
Cucumber in Chili Oil - Nice little app to get the palate going, light, a tad sweet and not spicy at all.
Szechuan Dan Dan Noodles - The noodles are tasty but the sauce needs to be a lot spicier... delish nonetheless. A couple spoonfuls of chili paste did the twick.
Leeks and Smoked Pork - Everything is better with bacon. You can substitute the leeks with poison ivy and it would still taste good.
Winter Melon Clam Soup - It doesn't have to be cold outside to eat soup. This was so light and delicate but the flavors really comes through with the first sip. Tons of ginger, winter melons and little neck clams. Yum.
Duck w/ Mustard Green Claypot - Totally threw me off with this dish. It was more like a noodle soup. Great flavor from the duck but yet light to the taste and the hint of bitterness from the mustard greens balanced it out.
Alongside with bubble teas, shaved ice and milk teas... they used to secretly sell bottles of Chuck Norris' urine... now, it's available widely today under the name Red Bull.
I kinda like eating in this kitschy Chinese carousel... but it would be even better if Chuck Norris roundhouse kick this ride to the tune of carnival music.
HAY-YA!!!
5412 Buford Hwy NE
Atlanta, GA 30340 (770) 458-8883
Chateau de Saigon
WTF is this? I look around and it's all roundeyes up in this piece...
1) - It's a friday night, WTF are they doing in Cham-bodia? Don't they know it's dark out?
B) - Shouldn't they be at Nan, Harry & Sons or some other 'safe' places in midtown?
Third) - Damn you Cliffy for writing up this joint up in the Loaf!!! (Brandishing my fists)
All the guys and gaos serving were running around like chickens with their heads cut off... looking confucius'ed and disoriental'ed. Ok, given that some of them were FOB's... but I think the whities gave them a run for their money. As with most Asian joints, if you have a relatively large group of peeps, you make like incest and do it family style. But like most interlopers, the menu was all Japanese to them. And that's what threw off the servers' momentum because they took too much time asking too many questions about the dishes.
We on the other hand made it easy for them and they still messed up a bit. No worries, it was to our advantage. The food was pretty darn tasty and the menu covered a lot of 'accurate' Vietnamese dishes. They were totally cool about BYOB, so I got on the horn and got Dio to pick up a fix for us. Hell, I needed it with the smell of fresh GAP and Polo wear in the air.
Spring Rolls- The premade ones and roll your own at the table were all tasty.
Shaken Beef- Super tender cubes of boeuf in a very light sweet glaze.
Sizzling Fish - Even though it wasn't sizzling or cooked table side, the handful of fresh dill really made it flavorful and aromatic.
Vietnamese Papaya Salad - I can't believe I enjoyed this ruffage... it was tasty filler.
Eggplant Claypot - Filled to the rim with moulinyan... just delish.
Pork Claypot - Filled 1/4 way to the rim with sweet, tender and charred piglet... 4 bites and gone in a flash. Don't be so chincy next time, stop swining.
Flat Rice Noodle Combo - yip, it had everything in it except dog meat and durian... yum.
Betal Wrap Rolls - no, it ain't grape leaves but they're so tasty you'll feel their wrath.
This place is a great replacement for the previous Viet resto and a lot prettier too! And I'm not just talking about the cute FOB servers. I just hope they don't dumb it down in the future with all the John and Jane Doe's that are filling up this joint like the Ark. I don't really care as long as they prepare my vittles in the Vietnamese vernacular.
DANH! ....Burp!
4300 Buford Highway
Ste 218
Chamblee, GA 30345 (404) 929-0034
1) - It's a friday night, WTF are they doing in Cham-bodia? Don't they know it's dark out?
B) - Shouldn't they be at Nan, Harry & Sons or some other 'safe' places in midtown?
Third) - Damn you Cliffy for writing up this joint up in the Loaf!!! (Brandishing my fists)
All the guys and gaos serving were running around like chickens with their heads cut off... looking confucius'ed and disoriental'ed. Ok, given that some of them were FOB's... but I think the whities gave them a run for their money. As with most Asian joints, if you have a relatively large group of peeps, you make like incest and do it family style. But like most interlopers, the menu was all Japanese to them. And that's what threw off the servers' momentum because they took too much time asking too many questions about the dishes.
We on the other hand made it easy for them and they still messed up a bit. No worries, it was to our advantage. The food was pretty darn tasty and the menu covered a lot of 'accurate' Vietnamese dishes. They were totally cool about BYOB, so I got on the horn and got Dio to pick up a fix for us. Hell, I needed it with the smell of fresh GAP and Polo wear in the air.
Spring Rolls- The premade ones and roll your own at the table were all tasty.
Shaken Beef- Super tender cubes of boeuf in a very light sweet glaze.
Sizzling Fish - Even though it wasn't sizzling or cooked table side, the handful of fresh dill really made it flavorful and aromatic.
Vietnamese Papaya Salad - I can't believe I enjoyed this ruffage... it was tasty filler.
Eggplant Claypot - Filled to the rim with moulinyan... just delish.
Pork Claypot - Filled 1/4 way to the rim with sweet, tender and charred piglet... 4 bites and gone in a flash. Don't be so chincy next time, stop swining.
Flat Rice Noodle Combo - yip, it had everything in it except dog meat and durian... yum.
Betal Wrap Rolls - no, it ain't grape leaves but they're so tasty you'll feel their wrath.
This place is a great replacement for the previous Viet resto and a lot prettier too! And I'm not just talking about the cute FOB servers. I just hope they don't dumb it down in the future with all the John and Jane Doe's that are filling up this joint like the Ark. I don't really care as long as they prepare my vittles in the Vietnamese vernacular.
DANH! ....Burp!
4300 Buford Highway
Ste 218
Chamblee, GA 30345 (404) 929-0034
Quoc Huong Banh Mi Fast Food
Subway can suck my Quoc!
Subway's bwead sticks ain't got nothing on their banh mi's. That fat heffer Jared would had lost the weight in half the time if he ate banh mi's instead of that pedestrian tubesteak. I never liked any of those dirty sammie chains, the processed slices of meat are bland and taste like cardboard... hell, have you seen who works at those places?! It's like they're doing community service.
Back to the banh mi! The Vietnamese baguette is excellent, soft of the inside and a light crispy crust outside. The roll itself is worth 2 dollars. The BBQ pork and steamed pork are my favs. The sliced pickled carrots and daikon, onions, cilantro, jalapeño peppers and homemade mayo is hardly useless filler but totally enhances the flavors. The banh mi ranges from $2 to $2 fiddy. Buy 5 get 1 fwee...
There's a party in my mouth and you're all invited. Afterhours in my belly.
BURP!
5150 Buford Hwy NE
Atlanta, GA 30340
(770) 936-0605
Subway's bwead sticks ain't got nothing on their banh mi's. That fat heffer Jared would had lost the weight in half the time if he ate banh mi's instead of that pedestrian tubesteak. I never liked any of those dirty sammie chains, the processed slices of meat are bland and taste like cardboard... hell, have you seen who works at those places?! It's like they're doing community service.
Back to the banh mi! The Vietnamese baguette is excellent, soft of the inside and a light crispy crust outside. The roll itself is worth 2 dollars. The BBQ pork and steamed pork are my favs. The sliced pickled carrots and daikon, onions, cilantro, jalapeño peppers and homemade mayo is hardly useless filler but totally enhances the flavors. The banh mi ranges from $2 to $2 fiddy. Buy 5 get 1 fwee...
There's a party in my mouth and you're all invited. Afterhours in my belly.
BURP!
5150 Buford Hwy NE
Atlanta, GA 30340
(770) 936-0605
Woodfire Grill
Since Michael Tuohy has left the building for good like Elvis... how good could it be under new ownership? Well, if they were smart they would keep the staff that worked under him... and like Graceland, they did. The kitchen and service were spot on... just a little timing issue but nothing that can't be fixed.
The first wine tasting with the new owners proved positive... for the future of this Atlanta icon. I hope they will continue on the tradition of locally sourced food because the reviews all have been nothing short of spectacular. Just one of the most consistent and creative resto in da ATL.
Take a gander of the grub that were paired with the flights of Viognier...
Veggie Assortment: Indian spiced okra & tomatoes, rattlesnake pole beans, fromage blanc stuffed Anaheim chile.
Pan Seared Sonoma Artisan Foie Gras, candied walnut pancakes, port wine-thyme glazed muscadines.
Pan Roasted Sonoma Artisan Duck Breast, chanterelle mushrooms, delicata squash, crushed pistachio, duck jus.
Crisp Fried Flat Creek Lodge Catfish stuffed with Georgia white shrimp, avocado mousseline, dried chile sauce.
Wood Grilled North Carolina "Poulet Rouge", wood oven morels, sweet herbs, white cheddar macaroni and cheese.
Pan Roasted South Carolina Mangrove Snapper, crispy Vidalia onion fritter, Indian spiced okra and small tomatoes.
I know, I know... WTF is up with the foie gras and duck bweast with white wines? Well, F U all! Sometimes things seem weird but it works... like a grilled PB&Banana sammie or just because I wanted it in my belly! I like to live on the edge, you can't stop me! I could seriously eat here on a weekly basis and do some damage to my wallet and bowels... you never know, one day Gastro might be found belly up over his throne. But at least he died like the King... a fat and happy little piglet in a velvet cape.
Oink Oink!
Burp!
1782 Cheshire Bridge Rd NE
Atlanta, GA 30324
(404) 347-9055
The first wine tasting with the new owners proved positive... for the future of this Atlanta icon. I hope they will continue on the tradition of locally sourced food because the reviews all have been nothing short of spectacular. Just one of the most consistent and creative resto in da ATL.
Take a gander of the grub that were paired with the flights of Viognier...
Veggie Assortment: Indian spiced okra & tomatoes, rattlesnake pole beans, fromage blanc stuffed Anaheim chile.
Pan Seared Sonoma Artisan Foie Gras, candied walnut pancakes, port wine-thyme glazed muscadines.
Pan Roasted Sonoma Artisan Duck Breast, chanterelle mushrooms, delicata squash, crushed pistachio, duck jus.
Crisp Fried Flat Creek Lodge Catfish stuffed with Georgia white shrimp, avocado mousseline, dried chile sauce.
Wood Grilled North Carolina "Poulet Rouge", wood oven morels, sweet herbs, white cheddar macaroni and cheese.
Pan Roasted South Carolina Mangrove Snapper, crispy Vidalia onion fritter, Indian spiced okra and small tomatoes.
I know, I know... WTF is up with the foie gras and duck bweast with white wines? Well, F U all! Sometimes things seem weird but it works... like a grilled PB&Banana sammie or just because I wanted it in my belly! I like to live on the edge, you can't stop me! I could seriously eat here on a weekly basis and do some damage to my wallet and bowels... you never know, one day Gastro might be found belly up over his throne. But at least he died like the King... a fat and happy little piglet in a velvet cape.
Oink Oink!
Burp!
1782 Cheshire Bridge Rd NE
Atlanta, GA 30324
(404) 347-9055
Steel Restaurant & Lounge
Sigh...
I'm giving this joint 2 stars because of a plethora of ridiculous reasons. I knew this place wasn't gonna wow me but I had to be fair and give it a chance... what better way than going on restaurant week to sample the grub. The special menu did look decent on paper... and prolly would tasted better too. The scene is just plain baffling... it was a circus sideshow because it was run by a bunch of human oddities.
8:00pm reservations, says they are behind a bit, no problem. I was offered to sit at the sushi bar, I spied it from afar and you basically stare at flat piece of dark wood. No thanks.
8:04pm, goto the bar to get a dwink, I get a beer because it's easy and they can't screw that up. My friend orders an Amaretto Sour, they were out so they look for another bottle.
8:10pm, still nothing... WTF? There's a Mac's next door! Screw it, just get me a vodka martini... wait, you do have vodka right?
8:15pm, a woman picks up a to go order and walks out, bartender notices she left her credit card behind. Instead of running after her, he asks me to chase her down! WTF?! No problem dude, I'll do your job for you pal... He did buy the martini though, you know a little something for the effort.
8:25pm, still at the bar because the table is still not ready... but for our inconvenience we get a bowl of edamame. Thanks freak, but I rather have a table so I can eat real food.
8:40pm, finally sit down and was offered another round of dwinks by the owner. Sure pal, I worked for it after all. After the dwinks arrive... I just ordered everything at once. Who knows if this hobo aka server would ever come back.
And the food...
Crabmeat Mango Spwing Roll- the fake crab leg meat just killed the whole damn thing and fried anything is always good... well, almost. Eh... Surimi.
Sushi Plate- some of the slimiest and worst hacked up pieces of warm chum. I think they got it out of that green mossy water fountain out front. Meh... Sea Monkeys.
Vietnamese Shaken Beef- shaken is right... right out of a dusty old rug. This was Mongolian beef you would find in any hole in the wall Chino takeout joint. Possum chunks on top of wilted greens drenched in super sweet brown sauce. Eh... Tootsie roll.
Chilean Sea Bass- golf ball size piece in a super sweet miso and sake glaze. Oh dear baby Jesus, did they run this thing under the glazer at Krispy Kreme? Miso wasabi sauce was totally inedible, it coulda peeled paint. Two sticks of tasty aspargus completed the "dish". Meh... Chin donutz.
Banana Egg Roll- 3 letters... WTF? WHY? HOW? Take your pick. They left out the ice cweam but coated the bottom of the plate with more sweet ooze. Barf... Purge.
Apple Wontons- looks like 3 tiny little fwied pies but 1 had no filling and the other two tasted worst than Mickey Deez apple pies. Once again, left out the ice cweam and more with this sweet goo on the plate. Dollar menu... Splash.
One of the worst meals I have eaten and the lack of service to complete it. So why 2 stars? 1 star for the 2 tasty sticks of asparagus and 1 star to the owner who got us two rounds of dwinks for their Mickey Mouse service. The regular menu is a total rip off, they should change their name to STEAL. Oh, I did ask the server why the ice cream were left out on the desserts... his answer, "We ran out". Well, I ran out of money so that's why I left out the TIP, pal...
Douche bag.
950 West Peachtree St
Suite 255
Atlanta, GA 30309
(404) 477-6111
I'm giving this joint 2 stars because of a plethora of ridiculous reasons. I knew this place wasn't gonna wow me but I had to be fair and give it a chance... what better way than going on restaurant week to sample the grub. The special menu did look decent on paper... and prolly would tasted better too. The scene is just plain baffling... it was a circus sideshow because it was run by a bunch of human oddities.
8:00pm reservations, says they are behind a bit, no problem. I was offered to sit at the sushi bar, I spied it from afar and you basically stare at flat piece of dark wood. No thanks.
8:04pm, goto the bar to get a dwink, I get a beer because it's easy and they can't screw that up. My friend orders an Amaretto Sour, they were out so they look for another bottle.
8:10pm, still nothing... WTF? There's a Mac's next door! Screw it, just get me a vodka martini... wait, you do have vodka right?
8:15pm, a woman picks up a to go order and walks out, bartender notices she left her credit card behind. Instead of running after her, he asks me to chase her down! WTF?! No problem dude, I'll do your job for you pal... He did buy the martini though, you know a little something for the effort.
8:25pm, still at the bar because the table is still not ready... but for our inconvenience we get a bowl of edamame. Thanks freak, but I rather have a table so I can eat real food.
8:40pm, finally sit down and was offered another round of dwinks by the owner. Sure pal, I worked for it after all. After the dwinks arrive... I just ordered everything at once. Who knows if this hobo aka server would ever come back.
And the food...
Crabmeat Mango Spwing Roll- the fake crab leg meat just killed the whole damn thing and fried anything is always good... well, almost. Eh... Surimi.
Sushi Plate- some of the slimiest and worst hacked up pieces of warm chum. I think they got it out of that green mossy water fountain out front. Meh... Sea Monkeys.
Vietnamese Shaken Beef- shaken is right... right out of a dusty old rug. This was Mongolian beef you would find in any hole in the wall Chino takeout joint. Possum chunks on top of wilted greens drenched in super sweet brown sauce. Eh... Tootsie roll.
Chilean Sea Bass- golf ball size piece in a super sweet miso and sake glaze. Oh dear baby Jesus, did they run this thing under the glazer at Krispy Kreme? Miso wasabi sauce was totally inedible, it coulda peeled paint. Two sticks of tasty aspargus completed the "dish". Meh... Chin donutz.
Banana Egg Roll- 3 letters... WTF? WHY? HOW? Take your pick. They left out the ice cweam but coated the bottom of the plate with more sweet ooze. Barf... Purge.
Apple Wontons- looks like 3 tiny little fwied pies but 1 had no filling and the other two tasted worst than Mickey Deez apple pies. Once again, left out the ice cweam and more with this sweet goo on the plate. Dollar menu... Splash.
One of the worst meals I have eaten and the lack of service to complete it. So why 2 stars? 1 star for the 2 tasty sticks of asparagus and 1 star to the owner who got us two rounds of dwinks for their Mickey Mouse service. The regular menu is a total rip off, they should change their name to STEAL. Oh, I did ask the server why the ice cream were left out on the desserts... his answer, "We ran out". Well, I ran out of money so that's why I left out the TIP, pal...
Douche bag.
950 West Peachtree St
Suite 255
Atlanta, GA 30309
(404) 477-6111
Hudson Grille
Why do American grub joints put an "E" at the end of grill? It makes me think the meat came from the grille of a car. The only thing, Olde English, I wanna see is "800" at the end. After eating the chow... I kinda wanted to be a deer caught in headlights. Just pour one for the Gastro.
I made the mistake of coming here on a friday after work. Holy crap, did I walk into the GAP by mistake? Talke about the Buckhead army. Everyone dressed exactly the same. If there were anymore khakis, it woulda been a tropic desert... especially with all the camel toes there. The service was so bad that Simple Jack coulda done a better job... one bartender for the entire patio and she doubled as a server, WTF? Don't they know you should never go 100% retard with one server on a friday happy hour? Every other word coming out of my mouth was, earmuffs, an expletive!
When then menu contains almost 100 items, you know what you are gonna get. It's like a long sidewalk... for pedestrians only. It's like an upscale Applebeez. I spied a plate on my table with a half gnawed steak that Homer wouldn't eat... It looked like Play-Doh! I stuck with the basics and it was still pretty bad. The "Kickin' Chili" was aptly named because it was cold and I was kickin myself. You know it's bad when your bowels say to you- "Wendy's chili gives me more of a challenge, pal!". A limped Caesar salad and the chinciest amount of dressing , talk about impotence, with stale croutons that a NYC pigeon would spit out.
The only dishes that looked decent were the Nathan's hot dogs and Anchor Bar sauced wings. 1 star for each which adds up to 2!
I rather watch Hudson Hawk. This place gave me the...
Razzies.
4046 Peachtree Rd NE
Atlanta, GA 30319 (404) 233-0313
I made the mistake of coming here on a friday after work. Holy crap, did I walk into the GAP by mistake? Talke about the Buckhead army. Everyone dressed exactly the same. If there were anymore khakis, it woulda been a tropic desert... especially with all the camel toes there. The service was so bad that Simple Jack coulda done a better job... one bartender for the entire patio and she doubled as a server, WTF? Don't they know you should never go 100% retard with one server on a friday happy hour? Every other word coming out of my mouth was, earmuffs, an expletive!
When then menu contains almost 100 items, you know what you are gonna get. It's like a long sidewalk... for pedestrians only. It's like an upscale Applebeez. I spied a plate on my table with a half gnawed steak that Homer wouldn't eat... It looked like Play-Doh! I stuck with the basics and it was still pretty bad. The "Kickin' Chili" was aptly named because it was cold and I was kickin myself. You know it's bad when your bowels say to you- "Wendy's chili gives me more of a challenge, pal!". A limped Caesar salad and the chinciest amount of dressing , talk about impotence, with stale croutons that a NYC pigeon would spit out.
The only dishes that looked decent were the Nathan's hot dogs and Anchor Bar sauced wings. 1 star for each which adds up to 2!
I rather watch Hudson Hawk. This place gave me the...
Razzies.
4046 Peachtree Rd NE
Atlanta, GA 30319 (404) 233-0313
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