I don't doubt that the Baker Dude down at the Beacon in Grant Park makes good cupcakes, pastries, quiches and sandwiches but they recently added Artisan pizzas (Made Fresh and Fast!) to their menu and are very proud of it... Since, it was a Sunday and Junior's was closed, I had to resort to trying this 'Za. They are very excited that they are slinging pizzas now. I, on the other hand had major reservations from a bakery... The generic pictures of the pies looked, well, generic. And second, they where giving away a small cup of soft serve with every pie. The soft serve was decent, especially, on a hot ass swamp ass day. I'm game to try out any type of pizza, who knows, they could be a pleasant surprise...
Then this creasture came out a few minzies later... Oh, lord, bless their heart... Here we go, let's just get it over with and be dunzo forever... Like ripping a band-aid off quickly. Just eat this slop really fast, Pouch... And you may not even notice it.
Margherita 'ZA. What. Da. Fuck. Is. That... Someone needs a shower because the fromunda cheese is fierce up in this piece. How is this even close to a margherita 'Za? It is absolutely revolting. When Crapa John's, Dominot's or Little Pissers conveyor belt 'Za looks more appetizing and edible than this specimen, you know something is rotten in the state of Atlanta. There is nothing attractive about this, but I need to take a closer look at this exhibit for my one reader...
Jesus Christ, look at that pathetic crust... It's like a prison shank disguised as a slice of 'ZA. The cheese is ultra greasy, the sauce was way too sweet, and the crust was like a matzo cracker. There was so much cheese on there that it flopped over even when folded in half or tried to fold it. If a kid made this at home, you may eat it just to appease his fragile entitled soul, but when you're paying top dollar for this, it better be half way edible. This wasn't even a quarter of the way edible. It was so bad that I actually felt sorry for them. You know the old saying, "There is no such thing as bad pizza." or "Pizza is like sex, even when it's bad, it's still pretty good." Well, I beg to differ, sir. I rather have sex with an armadillo on meth than eat this slop again. This was the worst pizza I have ever had in my measly life... Even compared to the ones from an Easy Bake oven. I beseech y'all to avoid this nasty pie at all costs... Even the hobos outside begging for scraps. Because it will be IBS-D central within minutes of consumption.
Flush.
1039 Grant Street SE
Ste B18
Atlanta, GA 30315
https://www.bakerdude.com/
1 comment:
that looks bad. I don't trust any restaurant in the zoo vicinity for anything remotely 'ethnic'. Have you tried Hello Chicken yet? Probably worth a visit. Their website is a bit overly flashy for my taste.
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