Hey, y'all, lookie here... Another intown ramen joint! Oh, boy... That's all this one horse town needs is another fucking purveyor of ramen. Well, I guess poke was out at the Beacon since that fad lasted a whole 2 weeks in 2018. The Beacon is a hidden little complex in Grant Park with a handful of restos and businesses and I kinda like it even though it caters directly to the millennial crowd. The Cardinal is one of my favorite drinking spots, love the cozy vibe in there. But one of the newest resto with some hype behind it because Atlanta can't get enough of ramen is Hotto Hotto. They have gone through a few revisions to their menu from 15 ramen to 7, sandos and baos wholly disappeared along with a few other preliminary items. Which is not a bad thing... Why have a giant menu with a bunch of half baked ideas, filter it down to the best tasting dishes and execute it consistently. I'm totally ok with a smaller menu, I'm actually for it, 15 items or less are usually the best menus.
If the tonkotsu ramen turns out to be as good as promised, Ton Ton may have a real contender... If not, then it's back to Sapporo Ichiban instant tonkotsu ramen for this fat bastard. Let's go take a first look shall we? There I go again with the "we", like people actually reads this crap...
The space is open, airy, modern and simple with a good size bar on the inside and also on the outside. The open kitchen is standard issues these days. They have TVs to play games because ramen and football goes hand in hand. They also have a DJ on Fridays but they close at 10PM? Do they also have a child care center for working moms? It almost sounds like they're trying to please everyone just to get bodies into the place... Hmmm, I don't give a shit about DJs, I care about food... Feed me, Seymour!
8 Jumbo Garlic Ponzu Wings, $9.95. Looks like someone can't count... Fat Murica got fucked again! No breading, just a good deep frying of naked skinned wangz... And these were fucking dericious. Sticky, salty sweet, garlicky with a hint of the ponzu tart-tangy-sweetness. It still had a crisp bite even with the glaze and the flesh was juicy and tender. I was actually impressed with this first dish from a brand new joint... There is a god of marsupial supremeness afterall! But I'm still fucking pissed they fucked me on the missing wing that I paid for. I really should quit while they're ahead...
Roasted Sesame Sticky Fries, $4.95 small. This may be as gimmicky as those fucking ridiculous totchos... There is nothing special about these brown bag fries except they were drenched with a sesame sweet sauce. It could be addictive if you were smoking some ganja but if you're not on drugs, the first few fries are fun but it gets muted after that. It's a try it once kinda item.
Hotto Tonkotsu Ramen, $15.95. One of the most pricey tonkotsu, if not the most expensive in this one horse town. For top dollar, this better make me pump and squirt uncontrollably... Unfortunately, this bowl of sodium was almost inedible. The tonkotsu broth was extremely salty and lacked any evidence of collagen from the pork bones only broth. They also have Chinese black mushrooms in there (supposedly shiitake) and they used the reconstituted reserved liquid from the black mushrooms in the broth as well. The salty black mushroom flavor is very prominent in there. The ramen noodles were springy, firm and toothy as it should be. I had a feeling they were from Sun... So, I asked the husband owner what kinda ramen noodles they use and he goes, ah, it's called Sun Noodles... I'm like that's great because most everyone in Atlanta is using Sun Noodles. He's like, oh, really? I'm like, where have you been in the last 5 years? He didn't even know they were from New Jersey or have a ramen joint in NYC (Ramen Lab is amazing, stand up eating only, sick!). The guy was like a clueless special chubby child that is loved by all... Kinda like Corky. Let's get back to this exhibit... The chashu and soft egg was spot on, but there was no way to get around that disgusting broth. They say it's creamy and milky... All I see is a rusty cesspool like draining the bottom tank of a 15 year old water heater. It lacked the stickiness from the collagen of the bones, it was obvious the broth was not simmered for hours overnight. They got a few elements of a proper tonkotsu right but the broth that pulls everything together was god awful... The salt factor was so overwhelming, you need to pound a gallon of water to dilute all that sodium in your system. Jesus, my toes are swelling up as we speak. Don't even waste your time or money on this tonkotsu, it is one of the worst examples in this town of ramen shops... And to put more salt on the gash, I had to wait longer for it because the server didn't write down the order (she "memorized" it) and sent out a Chicken Curry Don, instead. I said, is that the tonkotsu ramen? She had to think about it for a minute because she really didn't know the answer. I had to mouth it to her, noooooo...
Street Ramen, $11.95. 12 bucks for a brothless vegan ramen with an EGG in it... If the egg came first then it's ok... It's not a chicken yet. Did I mention it was 12 fucking dollars for noodles and cucumber cubes? Let's do a roll call of the ingredients to justify this price tag... Fried shallots, fresh cucumber salad, garlic oil and scallions. Hmmm, that sounds about right for that price point. Here's the verdict, it's not worth the price of admission to this side show... And that's where this belonged, to the side. Street ramen is right because you will want to throw it into the street after the first bite.
Teriyaki Chicken, $15.95. I actually ordered the Chicken Katsu but since my server has the memory of an elephant and didn't write down my order, I got the teriyaki instead. I didn't want to send another dish back and it wasn't a big loss because it was the same price and with my luck tonight, both dishes would probably look and taste the same anyways... Wait, could this be the Chicken Katsu in disguise? Shit, who cares, everything tastes like cheekan anyways, even chicken! Well, just look at that specimen... Take one guess on how that will taste. I'll give you a clue... It starts with cloying and sweet in the middle and ends with salty. Yes, that teriyaki was so syrupy sweet and incredibly salty once again. They do love their salt here. The chicken itself was really good after you squeegee 90% of the sauce off. It was tender and juicy excluding the sauce. The Asian sesame slaw was fine but not enough to cut the saltiness from the sauce. The rice had hard dried lumps in the middle, another evidence that old rice was mixed in with fresh rice. Teriyaki anything is so Americanized and I don't usually order it ever and this example solidifies my opinion on this gringorized slop.
Look, it started out really good with the dericious wings (minus 1 wing for the tanuki's share) but it took a turn for the worse real quick... Mixed feelings, buddy. Like going off a cliff in Gordon Gekko's new Maserati. Nothing else sampled was good enough to warrant a revisit from this marsupial anytime soon. But that shouldn't stop the pedestrians from living the hype because it's all about la vida loca. That fucking tonkotsu is still giving me nightmares along with hives from the sodium overdose. Eh, what does this fat fuck know, go give it a try and find out for yourselves. They seemed like nice people, so, support local even if the ramen suck... Hey, I did my part because I'm a proponent of mom & pop shops but I'm also a sucka, now, y'all do yours...
Flush.
1039 Grant St SE
Sute B10
Atlanta, GA 30315
https://hottohotto.com/
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