The EARL

Everybody and their mom has been here in the last decade and half... I come here for the burgers, the shows, cheap booze and your mom. After a bottle of Champagne (of Beers), she's putty in my hands. Zippp.

Anyhoo, this joint has looked the same and smelled the same for over an decade... Except for the EMOs in here, they've morphed into a whole new gender. Everyone looks so God damned depressed chain smoking cheap cigarettes. Stop blowing your ass-baited breath in my face or else I will be forced to fart in your general direction. Stop crying about how your parents doesn't understand you, because they don't give a fuck... Go watch Twilight again for the 100th time, you emotional prick.

The burger rocks... Just like your mom, I'll eat every last bit of it and lick that shit clean. I can't even tell you what else is on the menu. The drinks are cheap unless you suck down the top shelf shit like I do. Just like cousin Eddie's real tomato ketchup... "Oh, nothin' but the best" will only do for me.

The jukebox rocks as well but the shows are the shit when a local band plays... Like Snowden. Why do all the opening acts sound like someone is killing a cat out back... Where am I? Ming's BBQ? Those friggin EMOs are draining everyone's life force until Snowden stepped up to play. I looked over to some old dude named Joe and asked him what he thought about the band and their new album... He replied, "This is a big fucking deal!"

Touche, old dude... Touche.

Another Jameson, pweez.

Gulp.

488 Flat Shoals Ave SE
Atlanta, GA 30316
(404) 522-3950

www.badearl.com