This fat fuck is not just a glutton... But also a glutton for punishment. After that dismal display of dried out manchunks at Taylor'd BBQ which almost made me upchuck, I thought about taking a sabbatical from BBQ joints for awhile... Oh, c'mon, who the fuck does this porker think he is... Gandhi? The word Fasting does not mean not eating for a long period of time... Fasting in this slob's vocabulary means sending as much food over to my snout as Fast as possible. It's kinda like fisting but instead, I'm thrusting food repeatedly in and out my pouch and sometimes it gets ugly like the fat broads that wants a double order, animal style.
I did not wait more than a week to try this new BBQ joint that opened early December on Main Street in Tucker. It's from the same owners as Local No. 7 across the street and they also own Stratford Pub and Matador Cantina... Yeah, yeah, whatever on the latter two. Local No. 7 is exactly what it's named after.. There's usually 7 locals in the joint every night and you don't want to take any of them skanks home no matter how shitfaced you are with 3 pairs of beer goggles on... You may wake up gender neutral. And in my case, I need all the manhood I can get. Speaking of manhood...
Let's see if their manmeat is worthy of some food porn or just 6 feet under with Larry Flint...
Chicharrones, house made spiced pork rinds, $5. They said it was made to order... We'll see about that. It took awhile but it did come out still somewhat crackling and popping. Nice little crunchy skins to snack on while I wait for the meats.
2 Meat Combo Plate, Sliced Brisket, St. Louis Ribs, Brunswick Stew, Creamed Corn, $19. Thank god, I got my order in ASAP because 15 minzies later they were out of the brisket... I woulda walked out and came back another time if they ran out of brisket. But take a look at this spread... Doesn't look like much but the color was totally acceptable. Let's take a look at the sides first... The creamed corn looked like it was influenced by the popular elote. Every motherfucker in town is doing the "elote" style creamed corn these days.. Not that there is anything wrong with that. But if they start doing the fucking birria tacos... I'm gonna shit. Literally... Because those gimmicky birria tacos are wet, soggy, moist flaps of useless meat trimmings that goes right through your system that would even make Taco Bell blush. The creamed corn was flavorful and totally acceptable but not crave-worthy enough to get a double order. The Brunswick stew had good consistency, not runny at all but it was missing the all important lima beans. But overall, still pretty tasty to warrant another order or two in the future.
But enough talk of the side pieces... They all get old and tiresome after a couple bites... Let's get to the man-teins...
St. Louis Ribs. Oh, my... Excuse me, Peter North, how much for just one rib? These ribs looked pretty girthy... I just got the shivers down my spine like the first time I was tricked into walking into the Eagle...Ooooh. Wait, did I say my "first" time... Nevermind. Strap these two brutes in black leather and they would sell out every night in there. These ain't no skinny ribs... They were very meaty and juicy. I wished they had more rub on there for more bark, but the rosy smoke ring more than made up for it. Don't expect them to be fall off the bone tender because it would take a lot more time in the smoker to do that. I like a little pull to meaty ribs. Not too shabby at all... I would get them again and hopefully, they will get even better with time.
Sliced Brisket. Woof.. Reminds me of a floozy I dated for 7 1/2 hours back in the late 1900's. She had been around the block a few times.. Around the Chelsea Hotel... She was a lot of woman and had no issues with making $14 the hard way. But she was as dericious as this meat flap... I would go downtown on this on a bi-weekly basis. The good thing about this place is that sliced brisket is the default setting here... Because many-a-moons I forget to ask for sliced and end up disappointed with chopped up trimmings of mystery proteins with some fat blobs tossed in to make it look like it was all brisket with the fat cap. The smoke ring was spot-on like with the ribs, but it also needed more dry rub for a better bark. But these were competition worthy compared to the blocks of saw dust brisket served at Taylor'd BBQ.
The initial first visit was a promising one and I will be going back to see how their BBQ skills have improved over time... Because girls only want boyfriends who have great skills.
2337 Main St.
Tucker, GA 30084
https://www.fords-bbq.com/menu
