Atlas

There is no mistake that Atlas is an "upscale" joint, there is no contest that it's a beautiful joint, there is no question that the service staff is well trained... But as with all restos, expensive and inexpensive, they need to evolve to cater towards the ever changing crowd and palates. Hence, they have introduced the Tavern with a new menu with it... I think I will like this. It's a smart move on their part. Not everyone wants to spend beaucoup dinero on dinner to impress some cheap ass hooker you swiped on your phone... But you also don't want to look like a mook taking said hooker for a shitty ass burger at Snatch Shack, either... Err, I meant Shake Shack. God, that place is awful... Who the fuck eats there. One glance at your shit afterwards, I guarantee that you will never eat there again... But it's good for hookers, though. They relate to cheap meat. Ok, I'm getting side tracked here... Talking about hookers always does.
So, we all know Atlas is very swanky, very eloquent, well articulated and they run the joint right... So, what's all the fuss about the new Tavern? I made rez to Atlas but when I got there I was like fuck the dining room, it's too stuffy for this strapping young buck... I, instead, chose to nosh/drink either at the bar or the new tavern area. Shit, it's the same goddamn thing... And the dining room is like two feet away in the same room. The open kitchen is ultra clean and organized, very nice kitchen. The bar is a nice throw back to golden days when drinking was a classy art form... Makes me feel like the fat Gatsby. Ok, the dining room is really nice, too, but it's too dark for me... I hate eating in the dark, can't see if the protein is rabbit or cat. I wanted to eat at the bar because the booze is so close in reach but I also knew I would be sampling a bunch of plates and I didn't want to look like a hobo with plates all over the bar, so, I took a Tavern side table in the corner so I can spread eagle... I need to air out the Jimmy from time to time. Fuck, I'm so crass, what the hell am I doing here?
Christ, why do you talk so much, pouch? It's like you got a case of diarrhea of the mouth. Speaking of brown liquid flows... I needs me a dree-ank! I perused the cocktail menu, while it looked decent, nothing really jumped out at me... So, I started with a simple Old Fashioned... Time to get to work, y'all... You can order from the main menu as well but let's check out the new Tavern menu.

Well made Old Fashioned, simple, classic and tasty. The other thing was some sparkling Rosé that cost more than 2 Popeyes family meal box... That's a lot of fucking yummy cheekan right there.

Caramelized Veal Sweetbreads- Honey Glaze, Charred Broccoli, White Shoyu, Nam Pla, Cilantro, Toasted Benne. Nicely done. The sweetbreads were really good, firm but giving, had a great chew to it and the crispy sweet crust had a nice bite to it. I noticed how they're on board with the new trendy thing with the charred broccoli... Let's see how many other menus it will be on this year. This dish was a nice start... Don't die on me, ese!

Rosemary Roasted Ruby Beet Tartare- Woodsman and Wife Cheese, Toasted Pecans and Walnuts. Another gorgeous presentation. The beet tartare is nothing new but this worked and tasted beautifully. Sweet, crunch, creamy, tart... All the senses and mouth feel was there. Great little dish.

Beet Chips. These went with the beet tartare but they could stand on their own... Paired well with the tartare. Real nice.

Sauteed Snowpeas, Leaves and Shoots- Aleppo Chili, Ginger, Garlic. Snowpea leaves, tips and shoots have been such a big gimmick ingredient on the whitie menus around town for the last couple years... Making this used-to-be cheap ass veggie more and more expensive like the fucking unattainable oxtail these days without draining your wallet. Why do you fuckers have to ruin a good thing for the slopes, c'mon, they have large families to feed on a budget. But anyways, for $7, this was a steal for a place like this. It was bright, vibrant, seasoned well, and tasted great... They sourced some very young pea tendrils. Nice dish.

Citrus Cured Salmon Flatbread- Red Onion-Radish Slaw, Capers, Dill, Mascarpone, Everything Bagel Spice. It's such a low rent redneck Applebee's kinda dish but I have never been a trust fund baby, so I always ate shit like this as if it were goddamn truffles and caviar. It's a decent looking specimen... Something that I would serve at a Super Bowl party but since I have no fwendz, I usually go out and have some rube make it for me so I can cry myself to sleep in the corner. The thin crackly flatbread with a plethora of crap on top tasted pretty good, not spectacular but it brought back memories when I lived in a trailer park in Chelsea, next to the Hudson where I warshed my back with a rag on a stick... Ah, the good ol' days in NYC, but the bridge and tunnel crowd can be real assholes sometimes, they don't like simple country folk. I would prolly skip this dish next time and try something else.

Petit Lobster Pot Pie- Nueske's Smoked Bacon, Pearl Onion, Brandy, Puff Pastry, Wilted Romaine. I was looking forward to this little dish... Looks gorgeous doesn't it? Until, I noticed that the puff pastry turned out to be a fucking slider bun... WTF, yo? Turns out that "someone" in the kitchen tossed the entire inventory of puff pastry into the trash... This instantly reminded me of Nexto when that mook tossed out the entire pan of steamed buns into the garbage. Where am I? Someone open a window, I can't breathe... From the stupidity of people. The presentation was nice but that damn dense slider bun really ruined it for me... The rest of the dish- lobster and accoutrements were good, but the celery was a bit raw. It's amazing how one item on the dish can cloud the entire dish. But overall, it was still acceptable, I ain't that much of a dick... Don't you dare say it.

24 Hour Cast Iron Seared Steak- Hand-Cut, Aged Wagyu, Shiitake-Maitre'd Butter, Grilled Croutons, Crispy Onions. When I see wagyu at a some what affordable price point, I'm fucking ordering it... I know $19 ain't gonna get me full but a sweet little manmeat tasting to finish off this Tavern menu preview would be a nice way to end it. It looked glorious when it came out, the rosy beet red meat looked spot on and dericious... I was in for a treat, but cutting off a piece proved difficult. It wasn't as tender as expected even with a sharp steak knife, then I took a small bite and chew and chew and chew some more... Where is that fat girl with the Chewy mask when you need her for some background noise? Then on closer inspection, the piece of meat seemed to be cut with the grain... But still it was wagyu, it should still be tender as fuck and then I was informed that it was sous vide for 36 hours, not 24, at 131 degrees. That long at 131 degs? C'mon, broseph, you would think it would be like buttah, but it was a mystery that meat tightened up as much as it did. I sous vide my ribeye at 120 for like 45 minzies and it comes out perfect every time. I don't know, this was not the way I wanted to go out all up in this piece... This kinda killed my buzz from all the other goodies. Well, this sad manmeat and the slider bun for puff pastry. I quietly mentioned the problem with the wagyu and they quickly and professionally made this disappear from the check. Totally not necessary as I stated to them but they were pretty adamant about it... That's how you operate a resto of this caliber, mofos.

The couple of missteps during this Tavern menu tasting did not totally overshadow the entire evening, I was just fucking around. There were more hits than misses and the service was superb, as it should be. It's just a beautiful space and all the menus are thought out and approachable. It's nothing ground breaking or ultra adventurous but the creativity, attention to detail and execution more than makes up for it. I like this resto and the way they operate it... But will it be on my radar as a destination spot? Is kinda yes an answer? Ok, yes, but it will be a bleep closer to the edge of the radar. It is definitely not an everyday resto but if someone else is paying... Go fucking git ya some! The bar is stocked with a lot of pricey goodies... Now, I know where to go on the next expense account meal. Suckaz!

Just don't valet park, those retarded motherfuckers will fuck up your car... They drive it like they stole it. It ain't their car... Who gives a shit, right? I found the front end of my new car all fucked up underneath like they tried to jump the speed bump like Evel Knievel... They left two giant gashes on both sides of my bumper and those aren't the type of gashes I'm into. What's funny is that they expect money in return for doing you this favor to your car. Park next door and walk over... Fuck the valets.  

88 West Paces Ferry Rd NW
Atlanta, GA 30305
http://atlasrestaurant.com/menus/

Floataway Cafe

Floataway has been around for years and years for a reason, they are consistently good in menu evolution to execution. I have always liked this place but over the years they kinda fell off the radar with all the new spots popping up along the way in this town. It's time to make a revisit and see how they're doing these days... There's been some changes lately, starting with the chef. But there shouldn't be any execution problems since they usually promote from within. I'm friggin starving, enough with chit chat already, pouch... Let's feed already...
The space hasn't change much, it's pretty much a timeless decor that works in any decade... The menu hasn't change much either since the last chef. Time to sample a few bites... Well, my definition of a few bites may differ with other people's definition in respect to portion size and amount of dishes owned. Please keep your hands away from the pouch for your own safety, you have been warned...

Wood Grilled Octopus, crispy ceci, fennel. This looked so good it's almost an excuse to put this testicle all over me, errr, I mean tentacle. What? I was watching Better Off Dead before I came here... I swear my mind wasn't in the gutter, like usual. The octo was tender, lightly charred and just super tasty. The fried chickpeas gave it that little extra pop in texture. It's a simple good dish that was well executed.

Prosciutto di Parma, apple, basil. Large thin sheets of meat paper on a plate... I wanted to make origami with them, I'm really good at making those swans that can flap their wings... Right into my pouch. They were good like with all prosciutto but nothing really that memorable that I can't get anywhere else. It's a non-threatening dish for the masses, especially, with the melon ballers of apple.

Piccolo Fritto, young squid, onion, lemon, cauliflower, pepper vinegar. Basically a plate of fried sea creastures... A fritto misto. The presentation looks kinda thoughtless and low rent... Shit, dress it up a bit, make me feel like I ain't at a fry shack. Wait, fry shacks have fucking kick ass grub... I'm just saying for the price tag, it shoulda been presented a lil nicer. Maybe they're starting the new Fryer Basket to Plate movement. It's a fun dish to share but nothing was really that spectacular, same old ingredients found on every other menu. Still tasty, though.

Blue Crab Fritter, olive tapenade. Jesus, you can bowl a few frames with that crab ball before it falls apart from taking a bite after each frame... This thing is huge! And my mouth ain't that big. That's what she said... Really, a chick really said that. This was a thing of beauty, full of lumpy crab bits and the crispy crust will make your facehole happy. The olive tapenade wasn't really necessary except to hold that fucker in place.

Caserecce, veal meatballs, tomato, parmigiana. A glammed up version of spaghetti and meatballs. Love the curly pasta to catch all the sauce in it and the veal balls were large and soft to mouth. It's like eating fluffy meat pillows... I know a stripper that calls her enhanced girls the same thing but these veal balls tasted better with tomato sauce, less veiny, too.

Sorghum Gnocchi, sugo finto, brussels, kale chips, provalone piccante. This sorghum gimmick is still in effect on menus... What year is it, again? It's ok, though, if it works well then have at it... I'll still eat it. It's an interesting dish, not very appealing visually but tasted aight. I wouldn't get it again, though.

Maccheroni, Georgia white shrimp, romanesco, saffron, swiss chard, calabrian chili. I kinda liked these giant mac elbows. You can get a lot of shit tucked inside those elephant elbows. The whole romanesco broccoli is getting some attention recently and will play a bigger part on menus this year. I don't know if it works in this dish because they get all covered up by the sauce and oversized mac but it's interesting to see them in the dish and makes people curious of what they are. They were pretty chintzy on the shrimp.. Maybe a whole 3 smallish shrimp was found swimming on this plate.

Taglietelle, duck bolognese, percorino. This pic makes it seem like it's a huge portion but it's not. It was pretty small, maybe the size of a rainbow trout... Filleted. Server asks me if I'm ok with pork... I'm like yeah... Then she walks away. Then the hamster in my small head starts running on a wheel, thinking about what she just said. Then the dish came out... Took a bite of the "duck bolognese", it tasted more ground pork. I don't but I didn't taste duck anywhere in that bolognese... Oh, I say and I say it again, I been had! I been took! I been hoodwinked! Bamboozled! Led astray! Run amok! I wasn't impressed at all with this dish... Sad duck face.

Wood Oven Roasted Loup de Mer, fennel, radish, escarole. They asked if I wanted whole or filleted... What do you think, ese? Don't you know I'm loco? Whole, of course! So, I know what I'm eating... Kinda like when butchering a rabbit, always make sure you get the carcass with the feetz because a cat has the same exact anatomy without the paws. With this dish I wanted to see the fish head... Well, shit, I just wanted the cheeks. No one eats the damn cheeks, it's the best part of the fish like the oysters on a chicken. This branzino was pretty good... Nicely scored and ultra tender. Spot on execution on this dish. And the cheeks? I Hannibal kissed that little mermaid (perhaps merman?) and ripped it's face off. Where's that Chianti?

Hakurei Turnips, Semolina Gnocchi, Anson Mill Farro w/ Lacinato Kale. I can not lie but the veggie sides were better than most of the mains... Shit, I'm just gonna order all the sides and one main next time and the pouch will be all set.

Fried Brussels Sprouts. Can't fuck this up if you tried... Just fry everything and it will taste good. Speaking of which...

Ok, I know they are just fries but damn, they were good... Highly addictive like Mickey Dee's fries.

Gateau Victoire, chantilly cream. This flourless chocolate cake looked promising but I was never a fan of this cake. It's a fragile cake that is often too dry... And this just crumbled like sand when you try to fork a bite of it. It looked like work was put into this.. But this wasn't for me.

This revisit didn't tickle my balls like it did in the past after sampling most of the menu... While there were some very tasty dishes, the average ones clouded most of the meal. Not that it was bad but with their reputation and pedigree, you expect more from them. If this was just some other regular old Italian influenced resto, it would be great but they wouldn't be charging as much as they would here for it. It's still a good resto and they got their shit together operationally but the food was not crave worthy enough for the pouch to come back any time soon. Is there a Popeyes around here... All of the sudden I'm craving a spicy thigh with a little cajun sparkle. Happens every time after an average pricey meal.

1123 Zonolite Road
Atlanta, GA 30306
http://www.starprovisions.com/floataway-cafe/

Best BBQ Dim Sum

I was pretty happy when the new Asian Supermarket announced that it will open up in the old 99 Ranch space a few months ago... The location has been an empty curse for a long time with all the new competition around. The food court was small but there were no lack of small biz owners willing to open up shop there and taking the risk of an unproven market. I was super stoked when I saw that Best BBQ was opening a smaller second location there. I didn't want to drive all the way up to bumblefuck Duluth to get me some prized BBQ manmeats and the best dim sum in the "surrounding metro area". Then the shit fell apart, Best BBQ got an awful health inspection, discontinued all dim sum ops and the once great champion was now a study moppishness. But I still went and tried their second location a few times even with no dim sum, there were lots of hits and misses on the regular menu and the prices have all increased for a tiny food stall in the corner... Which was kinda insulting. Shit, the Chinatown food court still kicks serious ass with the tasty vittles found at the must go food stalls and they're still charging the same damn cheap ass prices.
And then one day the Asian Supermarket announced that they were closing down only a few months after the opened due to no business, seriously, the market was lacking big time and the prices weren't that competitive. They had a big store closing sale and the place emptied out, but the food stalls were still open... Not that there was really anything that good to go back there for. And like the phoenix rising from the ashes, the Asian Supermarket reopened under new management... I ain't gonna lie, (shit, when have I ever lied to my one reader) but it was exactly the same damn market for fuck sake. Same name, same shit in every aisle, same uncovered freezer burned fish balls in the bulk item freezers, same overpriced items, even the same damn cashier... I'm like, dude, why the fuck are you setting yourself up for the exact same failure as the last? But who gives a shit about the market, it's pretty much the same junk, go 100 yards down to the City Farmers Market, instead for your grocery shopping... Jesus, I'm just fucking going on and on about this useless dump. Let's get back to the task at hand... The DIM SUM.
So, one day on my way to picking up the best dan tats (egg tarts) in the city at Master Bakery, I stopped in to check out the new v2.0 Asian Supermarket... It looked the exact same as I said before, but... BUT... I spied a sign all the way in the back that said... Ready, motherfuckers? It said... "THE BEST DIM SUM IS BACK". I'm like shut the fuck up, yo... To myself, obviously. No joke, I fucking did the Hollywood Shuffle quick time to the back and see what the fuss was about. Best BBQ's mini location is doing dim sum, again! While the still made to order selections were limited (with just the greatest hits), I was still super happy that they were doing it at all... All I could think about was their ginormous har gaos that bested most dim sum joints even in Hong Kong. Ok, enough talk already, just get to the good stuff, you fat fuck... So, I only sampled a few items before I got too crazy and out of hand and to end up with just average dimz... But I still ordered more than I needed like a proper fat fuck should. Yes, y'all, live vicariously and voraciously through da pouch... I definitely won't disappoint in that department.

Wu Gok. So, this was the first thing that came out... I'm like it usually takes a bit of time to get this item out correctly executed... But one look said it all. Holy fuck. Look at the threading on this... It was perfectly manscaped, an amazing exhibit of a dim sum sexual. But looks can be deceiving... We need to open this specimen up. Let's operate with my facehole.

One bite... That's all it took for me to fall in love and laugh it up with this fuzz ball. Delicately fried crispy threads of taro and flour, smooth velvety taro and loaded with savory pork and scallions inside it's lair. The bottom of this wu gok had zero grease stain... It was close to perfection. Un-fucking-believable. This was an amazing start. Don't die on me, now!

Taste Test Sampler...  The har gaos were not as plump as they used to be but the translucent skin was spot on and the shrimp inside were steamed perfectly, they weren't mushy or gummy, just right. The shrimp cheung fun rice noodles were firm but yet pliable, they held everything together with ease and the chew was spot on. The only thing I didn't like was that they only used 2 shrimp instead of the standard 3, but not a deal breaker since it was steamed so nicely. The tripe was really good, big meaty tender pieces better than the limp stringy ones you find at other dimz dumps, great sauce but could used a lot more jalapeno since there was basically none in there. The shumai pork dumps were pretty respectable as well, not outstanding but craveworthy enough to get again on other visits.

Chives Shrimp Dumplings, Xiao Long Baos. The chives dumps were steamed and then lightly pan fried which were very chivy inside with some shrimp bits. The skin wrapper could be a little tighter, prolly sat in the steamer a tad bit longer than it should but it's something that 99% of the people wouldn't never notice, just me because I'm a dim sum drama queen. The soup dumps looked very plump and juicy, the skin was bit thicker but there were a decent amount of soup inside, a good showing but not the best for soup dumps. After inhaling every nugget of dimz... I was stuffed and announced that I will not over eat, I have to watch my girlish figure for 2017... Then this came out...

WTF... Demon Pig!!! I love it that they put cherries in his eyeholes and those frilly red paper on his ears... How embarrassing, we need to stop bullying finished meat products. Jesus, this oinker was a thing of beauty. The skin looked amazing, I could only imagine how crackling good it must be. Sadly, this was a customer's order... Yes, they do whole suckling pigs like this for $188... Which is a steal and a lucky number. I was so stuffed and sleepy from the dimz that I wanted to turn this piglet on it's side and crawl into his pouch cavity like a Tauntaun... Because I was in no condition to drive in a food coma... Leia, hear me, Leia... Come get me, I've fallen and I can't get up. Jesus, now I know how the Gamorrean guard feels when he fell into the Rancor's lair.

Their sign says it all... "THE BEST DIM SUM IS BACK, BABY!"...Ok, I added that last part. They must have read the cheekan lipz' review about their dimz from back in the day. After a few visits to the other dim sum joints recently, I had almost lost all confidence in finding good dim sum in this town but then this little angel came down from heaven to touch the pouch's heart, again. I know I have let the cat out of the bag on this little gem (again) and I'm gonna pay for it with longer lines but without customers they ain't gonna keep making the best dim sum in this one horse town. Just be selective on the items for now, they're still working to perfect others, but goddamn, for the time being I'm happy as an embarrassed roasted pig in an aluminum lined cardboard box.

5150 Buford Hwy NE
B-199
Doraville, GA 30340

Kitchen Six

The Oak Grove area is pretty much a quite neighborhood but they do have a few local joints around there... There's the townie favorite, The Grove, with beer and pretty decent wings but the crowd is older. Then there's Napoleon's which is a mixed crowd but mainly family oriented with a decent pub menu. And on the other side of the strip is Sprig which is a little bit more upscale in their menu and crowd. These townie joints are all acceptable in their own way... I'm ok with them every once in awhile. There's nothing really that special that warrants repeated visits.
There's other junky grub joints around like pizza and Mexican't but nothing you really want to ingest consciously, maybe when pissed drunk it's ok. Does this hood really need another local casual bar/resto that the others can't do in this area? Well, you're gonna get it no matter what you say... Kitchen Six took over the old Mezza space which supposedly had authentic Lebanese/Mediterranean cuisine... According to Yelpers. Well, I think we can figure out why they closed... 3 words- boiled chicken shawarma. But I'm still kinda curious about this new joint. They claim that "Kitchen Six was created for the community by the community... The mission was to offer an intentionally limited menu." And I'm ok with that... I prefer new restos to have limited menus so they can execute each dish consistently over and over again. But who knows with restos these days... They say one thing and do another. Let's go take an initial look and see what the first impression will hold for their future...
The inside is more spacious than it looks on the outside. The bar is decent size, can fit maybe 8-10 people depending on how fat you are... I took almost 2 seats but I sucked in the pouch and got into 1 seat, my muffin top was barely peeking out. It was a packed crowd and there were a bunch of high school children running around... I guess it was a safe space, didn't see any trophies, though. Hostess tells me that it will be like a 30 minzies wait for a table. Fuck that noise, I went straight to the bar and luckily there were 2 seats at the end. Ok, less talky, more drinky time...

I love getting double fisted... Wait, that didn't come out right... Y'all know what I mean, not that there is anything wrong with being double fisted, just don't forget the lube... Wait, this beer and whiskey duo is also known as the lesbian lubricant. Don't ask me how I know that. I really do like the absinthe fountain, it's a nice touch... Too bad not one customer in the entire joint touched it or even knew what it was or used for. The fucking millennials prolly think it's used to clean the bar tools. I would use it as a Chinese water torture on those lil useless snowflakes.

Pickled Veggie Salad- Pickled Golden Beets and Red Beets, Goat Cheese, Basil Oil. Decent looking small bowl of beets... But they didn't taste pickled at all, just plain old sweet beets. It's such a simple dish that it's hard to bust their balls about it, even though they were supposed to be pickled. If they were, they weren't bathe in the brine for long.

Fried Brussels- Crispy Brussel Sprout Hearts, Pine Street Market Bacon, Apple Mustard. This B.S. fad has been on every menu in every resto as long as the pork belly has... But did it taste like bullshit? Fuck no, just like the pork belly the brussels sprouts will still be a fan favorite for years to come. The apple mustard was interesting and worked pretty well with the overall dish.

Braised Beef Short Rib- Butternut Squash Gratin, French Beans, Red Wine Cherries. Jesus, unless you thicken that jus/sauce, it's just gonna swirl around the plate and make it look it was that time of the month for that short rib. They say you can use a tampon to plug up a bloody bullet gash with one, I just need to find the hole in this flesh rib. But instead, I'll just stick in my facehole... And that shit was tender as fuck. Tasted pretty damn decent and seasoned well. The nut squash 'gratin' was barely warmed through but it was acceptable and haricots verts were vibrant and fresh. It was a tasty dish, minus that useless cherry jus/sauce.

Grilled Bone-In Pork Chop- Braised Butter Cabbage, Baby Carrots, Kale, Apple Mustard Compote.

Their protein dishes were pretty much standard issue, you got the chicken, the steak, the short rib, salmon and pork... So, since I already had a beef dish and I usually never order chicken or salmon, it looks like it's the pork chop... Make sure to ask for it pink or medium minus or else you will get some leathery pig snout to gnaw on. This came out spot on, I was pleasantly surprised... Ok, I couldn't fucking believe it on the first try. They were keeping their streak going on my orders... You are so friggin lucky and don't even know it. The chop was tender and seasoned well. The cabbage, carrots and kale is just filler on there so the oinker wouldn't look so alone. Another simple dish that was executed nicely. Can't bash it too much.

The place, obviously, will be packed in the beginning because there just isn't that many options for the townies around here parts to nosh at... Looking at the crowd in here, these local yokels aren't the type to be driving around for the destination types of restos. They want close, convenient, easy, hip, new and affordable... This place has everything they want. My first impression was good with the generic/standard issue menu, but I will expect more from them going forward in the future and push the cocktail menu and dinner menu a lot more. They are off to a good start so far, I hope they don't get lazy and complacent... That's how it gets destroyed by the pouch.  

2751 Lavista Rd
Decatur, GA 30033
http://www.kitchensixoakgrove.com/

Brush Sushi Izakaya Revisit

When Brush first opened, it was Decatur's little best kept sushi secret... No one likes going to Decatur from midtown or the westside because it's such a fucking pain in the ass to get there. So, the locals around these here parts kept this amazing sooshee joint all to themselves. Who the fuck am I kidding, Decatur don't know jack shit about decent sushi... They have been jaded by Sushi Avenue's subpar sushi all these years, this is the only sushi they have ever known. My last visit and final one was god awful... The "chef" behind the sushi bar that made my "food" shoulda been making tandoori chicken and naan bread instead of sashimi and nigiri... Let's just say, I rather eat chum from a bucket at a bait shack than the sushi there. But with Brush's opening, the entire sushi scene in Decatur changed from low rent to Madison Ave. I like this place a lot, and I like that people in midtown and elsewhere do not like to drive to Decatur... Even though this joint is considered a destination spot in my book. But enough talk, what has the pouch been eating here lately... Anything new to report? Let's go find out what's on their menu lately...

Crab and Roe. Holy fuck. Look at this thing of beauty... Look at it's beady eyes... I'm gonna eat your fucking eyeballs. How fucking sick is this creasture... The entire shell is full of hand laid crab meat with roe mixed in... Then there's that giant ball of tiny roe. What a ridiculous and dericious sight to behold. This thing ain't cheap at almost $30 but for what it was, it was pretty goddamn amazing.

From the back side... Rock (crab) and Roe! How fucking cheesy was that shit... Jesus, I am such a loser. And I will eat the shit outta this all by myself at the sushi bar... Just like how I go to the movies by myself. I ain't sharing this motherfucker with anyone. It was so goddamn good.

Sweet Shrimp. This is the most amazing idea I have ever given to Jason... And he fucking nails it. The whole deep fried shell is a work of edible art. Eat the tail nigiri first, then finish it off with the crunchy body, eyeballs and all... So, goddamn guud. I'm suppose to get royalties for each order sold but I have yet seen a penny. Give me another sweet shrimp and I'll forget about it for tonight.

Nut Sack of Deep Fwied Sperm. There was a recent new article that said swallowing the white jizz juice is extremely healthy for you, it cures cancer and warts or some shit like that... Who the fuck am I to criticize science. So, pump pump me some of that baby gravy! Relax your throat and swallow like it was a bottle of Guava Jarritos... Gulp gulp... My tumor is gone, mofos... Fuck tumor! Wait, it's not a tumor, just my fupa... Dammit.

Kushiyaki. It's your standard mix of grilled meats on a stick... I like kushiyaki but it pales in comparison to all the other goodies they have in their arsenal.

Lionfish. This is what I'm talking about... The predator becomes the prey... Fuck poison! Wait, they're venomous... Who gives a shit, the pouch has an iron stomach. I fucking drink Alien's blood and french kiss their multi-extending jaw on the mouth... I ain't scared of a piece of shit lionfish. I loved this fried dish, from the crispy flaky white flesh to the crunchy fins and skeleton. Just an adventurous dish to sample.

Ankimo. Jesus, I always get this monkfish liver dish no matter what sushi joint I'm at... If it's on the menu, it's going into the pouch. This version has never failed me, it's just velvety and dericious.

Soba. Yeah, yeah, how boring can you get with plain old soba, right? Well, shit, this even surprised me when it came out... Ice cold soba in a light sweet dashi sauce topped with roe was incredibly tasty. I don't know if it was the crushed ice in there but I couldn't stop gobbling this up.

Scallop. When I saw the quality of the scallop, I just couldn't pass this up... Damn it was good. Firm, toothy, tender, fleshy and fresh all come to mind.

Soft Shell Crab Roll... AKA Spida Woll. Another low rent gaijin dish that I can't say no to... Yes, it's deep fried soft shell crab inside a friggin makimono or as crackers like to call it, a sushi roll... And it was da tits. It's like breast feeding in public when I eat this... I really don't want people to see me eating this but I'm also not ashamed to be seen eating this.

Sweet Shrimp. So damn good that I had to have more... Why am I obeast, again? I forget...

Brush Platter. Look at this fucking amazing tray of seafood shit from the abyss... And it's all going down into the pouch's abyss, never to be heard from again until 3 hours later when nature calls. I'm not gonna go into detail but every sample on this plank was fresh and firm, the colors were vibrant and eating it was like a religious ritual, a true mystical and magical experience... Wait, was there liger on here? I was slowly savoring every bite and morsel. The different levels of omakase available here are great options, too, but if you are on a diet like me, I would do the sampler platter... Like anyone believes that I'm on a diet after eating all that other shit before this.

Tamago. The tamago has always been treated like some red headed stepchild because it seems like it's for kids... But there is an art to make this correctly. This may not be the ultra traditional way of making a tamago but you don't expect them to here... And I really like their version. It kinda reminds me of a Japanese style genoise sponge cake... Shit, I kinda wanna soak it with some brown juice syrup on there... Everything is better with whiskey. Hell, everything is better when I'm liquored up.

Brush has been getting more and more recognition by the local rags but it's still not packed by any means... Like I said, people don't like to drive to Decatur, I was one of them when I lived in midtown... But their menu, quality ingredients and talent behind the knife is absolutely killing it in my book. This is my go to place for higher end sushi right now... It is a destination spot on da pouch's list and that list is quite short... And also their brown juice menu is not too shabby, either. I'm totally ok with people not wanting to drive all the way to Decatur. Midtown millennials need not apply... They don't do California rolls. Just saving y'all an unnecessary trip to save gas, the environment and all those other earthly causes.. And take a bath you filthy hairy hippies.

316 Church St
Decatur, GA 30030
http://www.brushatl.com/

Scout

The semi-highly anticipated Scout has recently opened in Oakhurst... This area needed a boost of something new... Not that it was garbage before but the same stagnant handful of places gets old pretty quick when you have ADD and BED (binge eating disorder) like me. The Scout is a spacious lair, it's open concept help create an airy feel to the place. The joint took awhile to open but I think it was worth it. The local mossbacks around these here parts seem to enjoy this new and shiny noshing and imbibing spot... Me too. I know the bar crew won't let me down since they are coming from P&P, but the kitchen, also veterans of the Georgian Terrace, will be dishing out a new menu that should cater towards the locals and the funky neighborhood... I assume it will be more family friendly but who knows... After a few rounds of brown juice cocktails, I was ready to nosh... Let's check it out and see what they got up their sleeves.

Bangs Island Mussels. A nice heaping bowl of mussels supplied with enough bread to sop up the broth and the broth was quite decent. It's a good start... 

Wood Smoked Chicken Wings. I love whole wings, it's the new trend nowadays in this town. The menu says 3 wings but there was 4, perhaps the 4th one was to make up for the smaller size... Who knows, I ain't complaining. The wings were kinda smokey, the rub was pretty tasty but the inside was kinda dry. The jalapeno ranch sauce was so watery and devoid of flavor that it was kinda useless... It just dripped right off the wing. I would pass on this until they work it out... It was kinda forgettable at this stage.

Chubbies Clam Roll. I fucking love clam rolls, lobster rolls, oyster roll, shrimp rolls... Any kinda roll with fried sea nuggets in it, I will eat it. The top split bun was correct but it wasn't even buttered or toasted/grilled. C'mon, any roll needs to buttered and toasted, that's like cooking 101. Besides the fail on the bun, the fried clam strips were passable... Even though it was more batter than clams. I get it, the clam strip shrinks when it's fried. At least the batter was light and crispy. I really wished there were clam bellies in there... That woulda been fucking sick. But I will have to monitor the development of this dish.

Pabst Battered Cauliflower, gruyere, horseradish sour cream. Ok, $7 for this... Talk about getting fucked in the ass. While it tasted as expected, nothing ground breaking or addictive... The 3 1/2 or is that 4 cauliflower, just looks chintzy... Seriously, cauliflower, the cheap red headed stepchild to the broccoli and they couldn't give you more than 4 florets. I would get more cauliflower in a MMA cage match... Get it? Cauliflower ears? Nevermind... Let's just skip this and go to the next dish.

Shaved Carrot & Brussels Sprouts, dates, barrel aged feta, pear dressing. Ok, first off, does the dates look like fried intestines you find at a Chino joint on Buford Hwy? It could be just me because I love that offal shit... No one eats that shit except me, literally, sometimes there's shit in there but after it's fried, it's amazing. But anyways, this salad looked so sad and boring... It's like something you make on the first week of culinary school. This was a real snoozer.

Twice Fried Chicken Quarters, savannah rice, pepita, baby bok choy. The idea of 2 whole leg quarters floured and fried sounds amazing on paper... But the logistics of eating a whole fried leg is quite a challenge in real life. You are going to cut that mother clucker in half anyways, so why not just do quarters... Plus, 4 pieces of fwied cheekan on a plate looks so much more value added to the paying customer. The crust/skin was really nice, great color, good crunch on the thin crusty skin... It could be seasoned a bit more but it worked. The flesh inside was half way between dry and moist... I don't know, maybe it was fried in advance and held in a warm box until service. It just didn't tasted made to order. See, if they did it in quarters (4 pieces), they coulda made this to order... Shit, do it Korean style, fried it once and hold it, then refry it a second time to order. The mushy bland "Spanish" rice was silly and the bok choy doesn't even work with fried chicken... Just stick with taters or mac with a simple country greens.

Roasted Salmon and Corn Cake, Pearl Couscous Souffle. Again, another dish that sounds great on paper but just didn't work as hoped in real life... This salmon corn cake "burger" was a tepid mess and didn't even taste good. One bite and I was down for the count. There's just something about chopped up salmon formed into a patty that's just weird. The pearl couscous souffle was flat and barely warmed. 

5 Hour Hanger Steak, spicy fries, blue cheese aioli. No one fucks up a steak, it's like the easiest thing to cook... But was I surprised that the first attempt at this didn't go as planned? Nope. Ok, first off, who puts skinny fries in a pool of jus or sauce... Second, that said sauce tasted like seafood, actually tasted like reduced lobster stock. Wait, was this a surf and turf... The steak looked well executed with the nice char and beet red interior, until you took a bite of it... It was chewy as fuck. How can that be... It looked so good. I don't know what happened to this but it was like some Twilight Zone shit. The server was nice enough to send it back to do over... The second attempt worked out a lot better with the sauce on the side... Which was some green peppercorn/juniper berry sauce, perhaps that's what tasted "fishy". The fries were dry and crispy and the steak was nicely executed. So, it wasn't a total loss.  

I ain't rushing back for the food here but hey, they just opened... You can't expect them to get this cooking shit down just yet but the bar side was on point with the cocktails and drinks. Even with all the misses on the grub, I still like the vibe and space... The service was pretty good even with a small staff on hand in the beginning. They got a good foundation to build upon but I think they should really reduce the menu and keep it simple in the beginning and focus on making a few items really really good, get that shit down and then be a little bit more adventurous later on. It's Oakhurst, no one is expecting fine dining here, but they are expecting fun dining. The place has a lot going for them, just try not to do everything for everybody on the first day, month or year because you know you will fail. But I have a feeling the locals around here won't even care about the food, it's a hip space that they can bring their kids to while feeling trendy and fashionable at the same time because they're just happy that they are out of the house.

321 W Hill St.
Decatur, GA 30030
http://scoutoakhurst.com/