Xin's Chinese Cuisine

A long time ago in a strip mall far, far away....

 

Episode LXIX. 

A New Pouch. 

It is a period of IBS war. 

Marsupial Pouch, striking 

from a hidden table, have won 

their first victory against

the evil Gwailo Empire.

Tis was the year 2006, the "Ma La" Sichuan movement in Atlanta was born out of a little known Chino joint in Marietta. The infamous and elusive Peter Chang was the opening chef at Tasty China. It became a hit almost overnight for fatsos who craved the "hot and numbing" dishes that were unavailable in this one horse town. The dry fried eggplant had become an iconic dish that mediocre Chino joints across GA and the country have been trying to replicate and duplicate with mixed success. Then all of the sudden Peter did his Houdini act quietly and the chefs that worked closely with him had to take the reigns and some went on to new and bigger things... Like Liu Ri (Rui Liu) who opened Masterpiece back in 2014 in a dumpy small strip mall next to a QT in Duluth. It was pretty good in the beginning but over time, the gwailo flashmobs diluted the quality and authentic taste (like at Lan Zhou Ramen) and I haven't been back since. Surprisingly, there was another Chinese resto a few doors down called Taipei Restaurant that no one knew or cared about, served mostly roundeye Chino slop (zero interest)... That was until Xin Zhao took over from the previous owner (around 2011) and decided to serve Sichuan cuisine, most likely inspired by the Peter Chang's days of yore. Since, I had no interest of ever coming back to this strip mall in upstate GA, I was reluctantly convinced otherwise by a friend who swore that Xin's was no joke, especially, with the spicy dry pot dishes. After the mediocre visit at Good Harvest, I had to prove someone wrong, either, my friend or this fat fuck. 

Let's go see what all the fuss is about...   

Spicy Dry Fried Eggplant. Not too shabby looking at first glance. Big pieces with a light crispy wet batter. These were pretty good but they weren't spicy enough, just look at the plate, no pepper seasoning, no Sichuan peppercorns, no red peppers... Would I order them again? The real question is- would I drive all the way up here for them again... Only if someone else is driving and paying. 

Tomato and Egg Noodle Soup. It says and looks like a soup but it's not a soup. It's just a soupy sauce. Tomato and egg is a very common everyday dish for Asian families, it's quick, easy and cheap to make and can feed a family of 8. This was a pretty good version. Lots of noodles beneath all that stuff on top. Mix it up really well and every bite will take you back to your childhood. You will get sloppy slurping this down your facehole.

Fish Fillet Spicy Pot. They didn't have my favorite dish, boiled fish in hot oil, so I resorted to getting the next closest thing... It looked like a hefty portion until you examined it closer. It's a good bit of filler like sliced potato and wood ears. The crispy fish fillets were pretty good, it was well seasoned but not spicy enough. It's a tasty dish but was it worth the drive? Y'all will have to decide for yourself.

Frogs Spicy Pot. So, Good Harvest's frog dry pot was a chopped up mess to eat... Xin's keep them Kermie legs whole and they were seasoned well but once again, not spicy enough. Same fillers. If you closed your eyeballs and ate the leg, it will would taste just like chicken... Mmm, did someone say Popeyes cheekan? If they came out with a big plate of Popeyes with Sichuan ma la seasonings... Fuck me. That would be some dream!

Pork Belly Stew with Bean Curd. Dish sounded great on paper but this wouldn't be visually appetizing to gringos expecting pork belly from PF Chang's. Stir it up because things get settled to the bottom. There's a good amount of pork belly but the real star of this dish was the bean curd knots. They absorbed the umami flavor of the stew and the bean curd sheets have that fruit rollup toothy mouth feel. I was going to untied those knots and filled it with the pork belly to make a little meat purse but people would think I'm some FOB from Temu that just snuck in through Eagle Pass.

Mushroom with Baby Bok Choy. If it wasn't for that one little handicapped shroom at the top this would have been picture perfect. Nah, it was perfect anyways. They actually took the time to plate each bok choy for the presentation. The light savory sauce was a great match for this dish and it glazed the shrooms perfectly. I make this dish at home a lot but I ain't wasting time plating when I can be eating it.

I would go back to try some other authentic Chino dishes but be warned the other half of their menu is heavily Americanized Chinese grub. They have to have it to stay in business because there is no fucking way in hell they will survive serving only to ex-pats from the more authentic side of the menu. Don't believe me? Go on Yelp and look at the pictures, it's full of the Americanized Chino menu items.

3940 Buford Hwy NE A103

Duluth, GA 30096

Sushi Kingdom vs. Sushi Village vs. Kizuna AYCE

Where the fuck have you been, Pouch? COVID is over, so morbidly obeast slobs are no longer in danger anymore. The only risk factor for fat fucks like me is over-eating... And I have been eating non-stop that I don't have time to write up more reviews in a timely manner... Like anyone really reads this deplorable food blog. It takes a lot of energy to press buttons, so, this chubby chaser needs more food. I'm so backed up on reviews... Just like my colon. But this is my one reader's lucky day... I'm constipated, so, what better way to pass the time while I sit on the white stool waiting to pass some brown stool then to write up a review! As Fat Albert would say, Hey hey hey, bombs away!

AYCE sushi buffets are like slutty Chino buffets... Some times you just crave an unlimited amount of unseasoned slop. Usually, after a night of heavy drinking. Everyone and their mamas have been to Nori Nori in Sandy Springs which I still visit every once in a while but I have to fast the day before and you must wear stretchy pants. Pouch, did you say "fast"? Yes, I did and this slow ass corpulent slug don't fast for nobody. So, it has to be a special occasion... Shit, my social life is pretty pathetic, so any occasion that involves food is always special. Unlike skinny people, food will never make fun of fat people... That's why food is my BFF (Best Fat Friend).

Nori Nori is the OG of AYCE sushi but let's take a look at a Trifecta of new AYCE sushi joints that have popped up recently. These buffets are not self serve like Nori Nori, they are kinda like semi-full service restaurants where a server takes your order on a tablet and the food is delivered out. OK, enough with the moist mouth breathing, Pouch, we want to see the goods... That's what she said.

SUSHI KINGDOM- DUNWOODY. 

It was $18.99 for lunch... Now, it's $20.99. The good old bait and switch after the grand opening week. The dinner is $39.99 but who knows if they have jacked that shit up even more as we speak.

Lunch menu.

2 hours ONLY limit... You go home now fat boy, you eat evey ting! We have no mo food!

Best of Best Roll... Is that Engrish? I read it so fast I thought it said Breast of Beast Rolls.

Sushi Bar action... The sushi chefs were in the weeds the entire time I was there. It's just too much volume for them to handle. Everything was made to order.

Bubble teas... In the grab and go fridge. Both tasted powdery.

Miso soup, Seaweed salad, Kani salad. Hard to screw these up.

Ribs & Corn Stew Pot... I know what y'all are thinking... Is that dirty sink water? Almost, but you can just barely make out the small slice of corn on the cob in the murky pond water.

Nigiri. They were all acceptable. Nothing special, just good enough for mass consumption.

Rainbow Roll and Crispy Crab Roll... I asked the server if the crispy crab roll was the same thing as a Spider Roll, he said, yes but this inedible shit came out instead... It was fake crab meat (surimi) battered and deep fried then rolled in rice. It was so bad, I almost threw it under the table in the corner to avoid the surcharge for unfinished slop. But I told the server it was disgusting and he took it away, no extra charge. 

Stick with the nigiri, at least you know what to expect.

Angus NY Stripe and Shrimp Hibachi. I'm glad they give small portions just to try out. 3 skrimps and 4 or 5 small cubes of grisly meat. They should have misspelled it to Anus, instead. If you stare at the meat long enough, it kinda resemble a balloon knot. Come to think of it, it tasted more like zebra... The stripe meat cuts.

Shrimp and Steak Noodle... It's basically lo mein that you find at any slutty chino hall in the wall. Eat the shrimp, leave the meat and noods.

Since, they have jacked up the prices, I will probably not make another visit. The quality was acceptable, but not good enough to pay more and deal with the crowds.

4788 Ashford Dunwoody Rd

Dunwoody, GA 30338

https://sushikingdomdunwoody.kwickmenu.com/

SUSHI VILLAGE- LAWRENCEVILLE.

Their AYCE lunch price is still $17.99 (M-F)... BUT sashimi and nigiri is not offered during lunch anymore or only at this location (original Cobb location may still offer it). BUT they say you can pay the Dinner price of $26.99 if you're really craving sashimi or nigiri minus all the other dinner items. I know I'm a fat fuck with unlimited Pouch space but shit, I don't have unlimited funds, especially, for lunch. Yeah, no thanks, bro...  I just want a quick lunch. Let's take a look at their newer and cleaner Lawrenceville location...

Kitchen Menu.

Lunch Sushi Menu.

Shrimp Tempura, Seaweed Salad, Miso Soup, Tempura Udon Shrimp.

Takoyaki. These were actually pretty tasty, most likely frozen from a brown bag. I like how the apps are only a couple pieces, good way to taste a bunch of stuff without wasting it if it sucked ass.

Sweet Potato Tempura, Chicken Katsu. Sweet tater is exactly what it tasted like. The cheekan katsu was surprisingly crispy and tender. I wanted to put in another order but I forgot my zip-lock back... Oh, snap, did I say that out loud?

Salmon Avocado Maki Roll. Looked a little sloppy but it tasted pretty good.

Rainbow Roll. The color was vibrant and tasted good.

Dragon Roll and Dancing Eel Roll. I was craving eel big time but halfway through I was over it. All the rolls were full sized rolls, so, they will fill you up fast. I suggest you take your time and eat slowly and massage your pannus to move the food around to make more space.

I like this place, the price is good but it's a hike from ITP. I would try the dinner menu if I was up this way.

1030 Old Peachtree Rd NW

Suite 106

Lawrenceville, GA 30043

sushivillagelawrenceville.com

KIZUNA SUSHI ALL YOU CAN EAT.

This is probably the newest sushi buffet in Metro-Atlanta. Shit, I wouldn't call Norcross metro, but whatever. Just don't step on the inbred locals passed out on the sidewalks in this strip mall. They got a lot of hype and crowds in the beginning but the honeymoon is pretty much over. The price is $28.99 for the dinner menu. I can't make it to upstate GA for lunch during the weekdays but I think the lunch menu is $18.99. They try to make the inside look like a full service restaurant... And it kinda is. They don't use tablets, you mark off what you want on the menu and a staff member puts it in the system. If you want more food, you have to reuse the same menu... Erase and check off new items.

I always thought I knew how all you can eat works but go ahead and explain it to the Pouch.

Yellowtail Jalapeno. It still amazes me that this infamous Nobu dish has been copied by every sushi joint in the country... Even at sushi buffets. I like how they try to plate a nice presentation at a buffet.

Tori Karaage. These fried cheekan bits were pretty good.

Seaweed Salad. Fancy presentation with thick toothpick base. OK, it's not wood, but something edible.

Age Tofu. Light crust outside and soft tofu inside. Decent.

Beef Skewer. Somewhat tender but passable.

Lamb Chops (Limit 1 per order). I tried to sneak in another round but got shot down. These were pretty good. I was pleasantly surprised it was cooked to correct temp, mid rare+. They were juicy and tasty. I could destroy 10 of these easily.

Calamari. Frozen brown bag varietal.

Chicken Wings. I gotta admit these were damn tasty. Thin crispy crust, juicy ass meat inside. I had to order another round.

Spicy Tuna and Alaska Hand Rolls (salmon, cucumber, avocado). That tuna was not what I expected and it tasted unexpected. Skip this one. The Alaska was much better and natural.

Shrimp Tempura and Eel Hand Rolls. The taco holders are so useful. Both hand rolls were totally passable.

Salmon Lover. That thin slice of salmon doesn't make me love this but I ate it anyways.

Nigiri assortment. The sweet shrimp looked and tasted good but they limit you to 1 per person. I get it with the lamb chops but sweet shrimp too? Stop being so fucking CHINTZY! I love giving, err, eating head, give me more heads and I even swallow... Every last drop of it. Eww, you sicko!

Dragon Roll, Rainbow Roll, Spider Roll. They actually looked great and it tasted totally fine. Good stuff and they do stuff you with all that rice expansion in your gullet.

More Nigiri, pretty decent quality.

Mussels. I don't know why I always order mussels but they tasted exactly how it should.

Yellowtail Jalapeno. I had to get it again... I had to circle back like Jen Psaki. Finished off this visit with a full circle.

I would like to try the weekday lunch menu one day but that means I would have to take off work and fight traffic to go upstate... Just thinking about it makes me go naaaah. 

5450 Peachtree Pkwy

Norcross, GA 30092

https://www.kizunasushiallyoucaneat.com/

 

These 3 visits were completed almost back to back. I'm like 3 times my normal size... Bloated, retaining water and smell like old fish... Close your fucking legs then, Pouch! Nobody wants to smell that sweaty catfish smegma. Time to hibernate again. But the Pouch promises my one fan that there will be a ridiculously incredible review coming soon that will not be fowl. Guaranteed.

Pump Pump Burp.

Two Fish Myanmar Cuisine

Myanmar (formerly Burma) or Burmese cuisine is not well known in this one horse town. The options are slim to none. The last and only acceptable resto that served this cuisine was Royal Myanmar located on the outskirts of the refugee homebase, Clarkston, they were pretty much the only real deal Burmese joint but they closed down in 2018. The Pouch wrote up that review back in April 2017 but sadly, they were a total let down. It wasn't a surprise they shut down, it was only a matter of time. What exactly is Burmese/Myanmar cuisine you axe? It's basically an Asian mutt, a mix of Chinese, Indian, Thai and Malay cuisines. Fast forward a few years later and the owners of Two Fish finally got a brick and mortar shop in the new Clarkston Market complex. The owners have tested a takeout business from their home for a couple years and the community backed them with plenty of support. Their ethnic comfy food is attracting new customers from around the city. It's not a destination spot but if you're looking for a taste of Burma, this joint is a good start for the uninitiated. I love these from rags to riches stories, it makes me want to support them even more because they are not bastardizing the cuisine to fit all palates just make a buck. 

One thing about this complex, the units are not full operating kitchen compliant, meaning they can not cook on premises. All food is prepared off premises and brought to the unit and are prepared and reheated to order. So, you have to be patient. Let's take a first look... And see if the Pouch approves. Fuck me, I hope they deliver the goods because I really don't want to IBS-D all over them like with Royal Myanmar... Or myself. At least not again today... Sometimes, Waffle House is not the cure for a hangover... Flush.

Tea Leaf Salad, fermented tea leaf mixed with shredded cabbage, tomato, roasted peanuts, sesame seeds, fried yellow split peas, fried garlic and dry shrimp, $7.99. This is the best known national dish of Burma... Because it is so customizable. And this version was pretty much spot-on classic. It's refreshing and so fresh and so clean clean on the palate.  

Papaya Salad, shredded green papaya mixed with cherry tomato, bean, dry shrimp, crushed peanuts, Thai chili peppers and lime juice, $9.99. Looks great but I think they are missing something in their description... It's so obvious... Here's a hint, they look like tiny watermelons... Thai eggplant! But I am totally OK with that. If they want to change it up a bit, I'm down with it. It's a well constructed papaya salad. It's not Thai style but you can ask them to make it as spicy as you want. I didn't go crazy on the heat because I wanted to taste the actual flavors of each ingredient... And it was pretty good. Next time, I will go full ass flaming hot.

Mohinga, rice noodle and fish soup, catfish cooked with ginger, garlic, onion and lemongrass served with boiled egg and crispy peas, $7.50. The national noodle dish of Burma, errr, Myanmar, whatever. It's a hefty bowl for the price. Shit, you can't even get a SMALL bowl of pho for under $10 anywhere anymore, so, this noodle bowl is a great deal and also authentically homemade. This is one item that you must get if you never had Burmese cuisine. It was hearty and satisfying and quite tasty, too. The "sheet" of crispy peas reminds me of the Chinese bubble waffle.

Kyay Oo Sigyet, rice vermicelli, mixed with pork, meatball, intestine, tofu, quail egg, garlic and choy sum, $9.99. I fucking love anything offal and this noodle bowl was not awful at all. I love they keep the broth separate... Kinda like a tsukemen. But the broth here is light and subtle and not thick and salty like the tsukemen. Of course, this fat fuck always inspects each ingredient and right away the Pouch noticed that the quail eggs were missing. They were quick to bring out a few quail eggs to make up for the mistake. You may be tempted to dump the broth into the bowl but don't. Just dip each ingredient into the broth and swirl and then eat it. It's a totally different experience than slurping and shoveling it all down your facehole. I like this noodle bowl a lot. It's definitely homey comfort vittles.

Chicken Biryani, $10.00. This is not on the menu, it's a special. They come in tin boxes in the grab and go cooler. But they will warm it up for you if you want to eat it there. It's a hefty portion and comes with a quarter cheekan (leg and thigh, dark meat naturally!). It's not like the Indian biryani you had before but it definitely has its roots. It is very flavorful and the chicken is fork tender. It's addictive and you just want to keep eating it even with all the other dishes on table. Tis was a good dish. 

If you want a taste of pretty authentic Burmese grub, this is the place to go... The refugee central of Atlanta, shit, maybe in all of Georgia. The food was all good and I will need to try all the other items on the menu sooner rather than later. The owners are humble, appreciative and hardworking, I would go back for that reason alone... They are the real deal mom & pop shop. So, for all y'all roundeyes... Don't just talk the talk, walk the walk if you truly believe in supporting local businesses. They are legit. So, the next time you hear a G.I. ask, "What do we get for 10 dollars?" 

You can reply, "Anyting you want..." 

"Anything?!" 

"Anyting... On the menu." 

Git ya som... tum! 

This initial visit and sampling made the Pouch go... Pump pump... Squirt. 

980 Rowland St

Suite 4130

Clarkston, GA 30021

Good Harvest

Everyone and their mothers have done hot pot... You know, shabu shabu... Where you dump 10 lbs of assorted raw shit into a vat of hot lava inside a cauldron 5 inches from your face. If you don't be careful, you could end up like that kraut, Toht, who's face melted off staring directly into God's hot pot, the Ark. The Pouch does hot pot differently by swallowing all the raw ingredients into its pannus first and then funnel the boiling hot broth and do the washing machine motion until everything is cooked. With this method, you don't have to waste time and wait for every morsel to be cooked individually and then eat it. It's very time consuming... I just want to get right to the food coma stage and hibernate for a week. It's totally unorthodox, but I call it Hot Pouch. My favorite movie with the best hot pot scene was in Fatal Attraction... Alex musta got a hold of my grandma's ancient Chinese secret family recipe for rabbit hot pot. I just wished I coulda tasted it after it was done cooking in that scene. I have a great spicy dipping sauce to go with it, too.

Yes, everyone has had hot pot but how many people have done dry pot? No liquid, just a giant metal pot of bite size meats and seafood in varying levels of mala. There is no resto that specializes only in dry pot but you can pretty much find it on almost every Chino resto's menu. Chong Qing Hot Pot in the Chinatown food court has good hot pot but also some pretty damn decent dry pots on the cheap, too. My buddy wanted a dry pot only spot... So, he wanted to try Good Harvest in the Asian Square. I must admit, I pretty much ignored this corner of the strip mall because it's kinda like the left side of the Chinatown food court which caters towards the hombres and gringos. BBQ Corner 2 is full roundeyes and brownies, so, I know the grub will be slutty as fuck. But somehow, Good Harvest actually have ex-pats eating inside. Well, fuck me silly and call me Sally... Because I'm such a slut. Let's go check out what all the fuss is about...

Their website states, "The Finest & Most Authentic Chinese Cuisine in Atlanta. Eatery serving hot pot and dry pot, among other contemporary Sichuan dishes." OK, you got my attention but can and will you deliver the goods? The hostess sat the Pouch party at the corner table because they don't want the other customers to throw up at the sight of this lardass consuming mass quantities like a Conehead. Then our server dropped off some menus and disappeared... We waited and waited for him to come back... I'm NOT going to be IGNORED, Dan...

He finally came back and we put in our order ASAP before this motherfucker channels Houdini and disappears, again. They also got that stupid robot bringing out all sorts of random shit that didn't even make sense like cups with ice but no water in it, empty beer bottles, one fucking chopstick... No, not one pair, just one goddamn stick... Which I wanted to stab him in the eye like a Capri Sun. I just got up and went to the server station and grabbed what I needed for the table. Fuck, I'm done working for free here... Bring on the grub!  

Pork Foss Charpati, $8.95. It's quite a hefty portion of roti... Only if they had some spicy curry to dip these crispy pancakes in, it would totally be heaven. They are quite tasty and addictive.

Eggs Charpati, $8.95. This sounded way better than it tasted... It wasn't bad but I thought it would have more flavor. But still a pretty tasty snack. Oh, I ate more than one of these... How could you not?

Sesame Charpati, $8.95. You can definitely taste the sesame in this one... Very tasty and poof! It was gone pretty fast.

Marinated Pig's Ears, $11.55. These ain't for the faint of hearth AKA pussy-ass-motherfuckaz... These ain't cut into thin julienne strips to hide what they truly are... But instead big giant pieces of pig ears. I could weave this into primitive shoes which would be perfect for my survival chances on Naked and Afraid. We all know shoes and bras are the most important things for your wilderness survival... And pig ears. I liked these a lot, they were thick cut and you knew what you were eating. I love the crunch and chew of it. Roundeyes will not be ordering/eating this, no matter how many times they say they have been to Asia and was accepted like family there. This dish makes Leatherface jealous...

Spicy Beef Tendon, $11.55. And the gwailos thought the pig ears were bad... These look udderly revolting but these thin slices of tendon that resembled charred onions were amazingly dericious. Tendon is a super food. It's rich in collagen which helps with nail and bone health, hair strength, joint mobility and most of all it keeps your skin elastic and youthful... I have seen so many women with faces that suffer from wenisitis, you know, elbow skin face. And coincidently they also suffer from ugly baby face knees syndrome, too. I don't know if there is a correlation there but studies have shown that these broads don't swallow, either. And we all know the proven health benefits of the baby gravy, also known as choad nectar, dongwater, man chowder, nut butter, throat yogurt, white honey... Ladies, next time you fancy a cocktail lounge looking for free libations, make sure you chase those pricey drinks with an order of the Gentlemen's Relish. He would totally appreciate it. Squirt.

Dry Pot- Pick Two $42.95, Frog +$5, Spicy Diced Chicken, Mild, Rattan Pepper. This giant cauldron of fried foul and amphibian morsels looked pretty impressive in it's presentation. It's a hefty portion, definitely requires a team effort. The spicy diced chicken were like McNuggets and once you pop, you just can't stop. It's not really spicy but seasoned nicely. The frog leg nuggets tasted like chicken but there were too many bones to deal with each bite, even with their low density bones. A couple of peeps lost interest after only a couple of pieces, it was too much work to eat them. This fat fuck gobbled them all up... I like frog but I don't usually order them since there's always better protein on the menu than this overpriced cheap meat substitute. Frog leg is cheap as fuck, why the premium up charge? 

Dry Pot- Pick Three $56.95, Chili Shrimp & Calamari, Golden Pepper Crispy Fish +$5, Prime Rib Black Pepper Sauce +$5, Mild, Rattan Pepper. As with the other cauldron, it's quite an impressive spread with this 3 option display... This is bigger than my fire pit. The head on shrimp is always a hit. The calamari was a bit chewy and I was hoping for more tentacles than strips of body tube. The crispy fish was an advertising failure, it was not crispy, more like braised. And the portion was chintzy as fuck for the up charge. But it had good flavor on the two pieces I ate. The prime rib was nothing to write home about especially with another up charge. They were overcooked, chewy and bony.

Look, this whole dry pot scam is more for the show rather than the substance. It's fun to bring people who don't usually eat dry pot for the visual of it. It's definitely not for two or even four people, you will need at least 6 fat bodies to make a dent in these giant dry pot pans. I was always curious about this joint and now, I have finally tried it and there probably won't be a second visit... Not even for the hot pot. Go ahead and try it for yourself and you be the judge. The Pouch is going to stick with the clay pots, so much more flavor, depth and complexity.

Half a pump... Then a squirt for the beef chowfun at Ming's afterwards.

5150 Buford Hwy

NE C-120

Doraville, GA 30340

https://www.goodharvestatl.com/