I know my one reader has been clamoring and cursing the pouch to write this shit up... Patience my young pouchawan eater... You'll get nothing and like it. I'll get to it when I get to it... Because when you're a fat fucking marsupial sloth, moving quickly is something that the pouch doesn't do well... That is a luxury only skinny people in Lululemon yoga pants can afford. Plus, this place is in the armpit of Atlanta called the westside. I have to plan this journey like 8 days in advance to this BBQ pit... Based on the reviews, this joint seems to be like a pilgrimage of sorts to the Mecca of smoked manmeats. Basically, everyone has been licking their taint since they opened... Like the useless stretch of skin that the taint is, this BBQ joint is also located on a useless stretch of road that produces an undesirable odor until you pull into their driveway with a cloud of hickory smoke that surrounds you like your grandma's bloomers. The glowing reviews are a good sign that this place is legit but after talking to some BBQ enthusiasts, I will remain neutral until I have tasted the goods.
Walked in and the first thing I got was a big puff of smoke like I was on the set of Friday 4... Puff puff give, Smokey... Shit, i
f this is gonna be that kinda party, I'm gonna stick my dick in the mashed potatoes! The heavy whiff of smoke was a real good sign of what the product could be... I was getting a major blood flow. Could all these rave reviews be spot on? Who the fuck knows, but I don't trust shit until that shit is in my mouth... Wait, that didn't come out right. Sat at the bar like the fat hooker that I am... Demanding meat to be rammed inside my facehole and pouch. Let's see if their smoked meats are certified, smokified or borderline certifiable.
Peach Mustard, Spicy Vinegar Sauce and the red ketchup bottle is their regular BBQ sauce. They were ok, but I don't really use sauce anyways.
Fried Pickles. Beautiful golden brown color, crispy and crunchy and they were pickled spot on. They were pretty good and kinda addictive until the manmeat sampler came out... Then they were reduced to a red-headed stepchild and forgotten.
Sampler Plate, pork, chicken, ribs, brisket ($4 up charge), mac & cheez, hash & rice, Cracklin cornbread. This was giving me the meat sweats already without even taking a bite... It's a raining manmeat up in this piece. The one day out of the year I wished I wore underpants. My taint was getting moist from these gorgeous looking smoked manmeat. And smoked they were, properly done and pretty tender throughout. The ribs had a nice thin bark on it and the pink smoke ring said it all.. They were teeth pulled off the bone tender but a tad bit dry, as much as I didn't want to I had to use a little sauce to lube it a bit down my gullet. The chicken was smoked and seasoned nicely as well but it was also a tad bit dry... Let's face it, no one really orders the chicken at BBQ joints like this, it's all about the ribs, brisket and pork. The pulled pork was a mix of new and old meat shreds, some were moist and tender while others were stringy and dry and even a bit off on the color... I'm not surprised that they would mix it up but I would have used the older stuff for stews or what not. Speaking of which I was kinda disappointed that they didn't have Brunswick stew... The mac n cheez was not filled with gooey goodness, it was kinda dry and tasteless, the hash and rice was something a little different than what you see on most BBQ menus. It was like a dry Brunswick stew (hash) on top of rice, not bad at all but not something I would order again. I shoulda prolly stuck with the beans and greens. The Cracklin' cornbread was like a flapjack with slivers of pig ears in it... They were hard as fuck to chew and after a few bites I was over it... It mighta been better with bits of crunchy pork rinds/skins in there for that "Cracklin'" factor, maybe they shoulda called it "Chewin' cornbwead" instead. Last but not least... The brisket, well, I'll let the pouch tell y'all about it next...
Brisket, up close and personal. Very smokey, nice bark, a faint smoke ring and pretty tender overall. They coulda trimmed the fat a little bit more at certain spots because they just didn't fully render but it didn't affect the overall end product. The brisket was pretty good but it was also a tad bit dry... Nothing that a little spicy vinegar sauce couldn't fix. But I was wondering what did they do with the drippings... I mean that juice is like the holiest of holy and I love juice from any hole. Any meat dipped or soaked in it's own drippings can turn a regular old piece of meat flap into an amazing piece of man meat. I wished they did that with the brisket and the other meats as well. It wasn't bad in any way, shape or form... It was a very nice specimen of what a smoked brisket should be but all I can think of was how much better it woulda been with the drippings.
Banana Pudding. If they got it on the menu, it's going into my snout... There's something magical about washing down all that manmeat with a proper banana puddin' rogering... And they did not disappoint. This was a creamy gooey banana pudding with the correct amount of nilla wafers incorporated just right, not too much and not too little, they were also just spot on with the softness of the wafers in there. It's a nice banana pudding... But I gotta say Community Q's BP might still be the best one in the city.
The BBQ here is legit and the service was surprisingly good, it's a great addition to the 'cue scene in this city which is getting better and better every year... But there's still only a handful of time tested BBQ joints that will end up on my regular rotation... This joint is on the bottom of that list which is not bad only because of the shitty location and the meats didn't hit it outta da park for the pouch on this visit. There's no doubt that they know what they are doing and the quality is there, you can smell, see and taste it... I will be back again but next time I will go earlier for the fresher meats that just came out of the smoker. I will report back and hopefully, next time, it will blow my mind... Then I'm going around the corner to get my other brain blown... Zippp... Slap slap squirt.
2061 Main St NW
Atlanta, GA 30318
http://www.bscracklinbbq.com/
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